View Full Version : Advise for an instructor on self-control

10th December 2002, 18:51
Well here I am again. Asking another question of my e-budo brothers (and sisters). This particular question had to do with the integration of the art you study and your job and home life. How have you dealt with this situation?

I, as well as many others I know, try to stay low profile about studying any martial arts. I mean that in the respect of not bragging or trying to recruit students. It also helps to avoid that " so yer a kurotty guy huh? I bet that stuff won't work on me." situation.

I don't seem to have the problem of mixing home life and dojo life, as much as work life and dojo life. Let me explain. In the dojo we practice phsyical techniques, which fit in to any part of life fine, and we are taught phsychological principles to guide us in the use of the phsyical. Not so much as any type of religous guidance, but rather the standard muga, mushin, mizu no kokoro and non abiding mind teachings. I know these are the common examples, and that's why I use them. Certainly each school has their own unique teachings along these lines. I seem to fall into the trap of frustration with people knowing full well I have more control over my emotions and feelings than what I sometimes display. I don't go postal or anything remotely violent. I just some times show too much emotion. No sadness, mostly disgust with certain people and situations.

I'm an instructor myself and have no trouble conducting myself appropriately in class. For some reason I can't carry over that same state of mind into the job front. I conduct my self with respect and dignity but seem to almost conform to the norms of the given situation. I am concentrating on staying away from the norms that have been an inherent lesson learned from day one on earth taught to us by what we observe in everyday life.

I thank all of you for your patience in reading my speedbumps in life and for all the responses I get. This may have been better posted in budo no kokoro, but I always seem to get such valuable points of view here.