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Cody
3rd May 2003, 10:16
Chippy gets close shave on 'lucky hole'


By Ryann Connell
Staff Writer

May 3, 2003



A sexagenarian running a carpentry business in Osaka has been praying to the gods for deliverance following a less-than-pleasant "holey" experience, according to Gatsun (June).

Tourists in a Hyogo Prefecture town were recently horrified to discover the 61-year-old chippy lying unconscious on the ground with a pool of blood forming around his pelvic region.

It was only after he was rushed to a nearby hospital and had received treatment for the removal of nearly all the skin on his malehood that police learned exactly how his affliction came about.

Gatsun says the old carpenter had been on a company trip with his employees and their respective partners.

As is the wont with such trips, the group imbibed in a fair amount of booze. While the womenfolk returned to their hotel early, the men continued to carouse in the resort areas myriad nightclubs, traveling from one spot to another and consuming copious amounts.

Our company boss soon found himself alone and in front of a sex shop known as a "Lucky Hole" joint. A "Lucky Hole" joint is ordinarily a tiny room containing no other decorations than a life-sized photo of a young woman in the nude.

Instead of genitalia being shown on the photo - an illegality in Japan - an orifice, the supposedly lucky hole that gives the service its name, is cut into the wall. The customer is then free to insert their appendage into the hole where a woman on the other side will deal with it in either her own handy way or by paying it lip service.

Not being able to see who is on the other side is supposed to add to the thrill of using it, but it's difficult to see it as being anything other than a last resort for the hard up.

Our carpenter seemed to have things under control until he went into the "Lucky Hole" room. Following the standard procedure, he unsheathed his weapon and proceeded to place it in the available orifice. Little did he know that this hole was built for speed and not necessarily comfort.

But, through a combination of the old man's lack of stature - he's only 152 centimeters tall - that required him to stand on tiptoe while he worked and his inebriation, each time he ground his pelvis against the wall he was actually ripping shreds of skin off his shard as it rubbed against the edge of the hole. Eventually the pain overcame the anesthetic effects of the alcohol he'd consumed and he raced outside to collapse on the ground.

"Our company boss is really a masochist," one of his employees tells Gatsun. "He's always complaining about having no money because he's spent it all at S&M clubs. In that regard, I suppose what he ended up with turned out to be his kind of 'Lucky Hole.'"