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Prince Loeffler
18th June 2003, 08:25
Signs You Aren't Dating "Mr. Personality"


- Changes his "color" depending on his mood. And lemme tell ya,
"Mr. Blue" is *no* fun at all.


- The mask he's wearing is not so much "mysterious" as it is
"Spider-Man."


- He's spent the last month sitting next to Paula Abdul and his
name's not Randy Jackson.


- His last wife died of boredom. Literally.


- He bears a striking resemblance to Al Gore. Wait, he *is* Al
Gore!


- "So then, she starts talking to me in Klingon, but she
mispronounces the word for 'Starship'! Can you believe it?"


- Turns out that's not the pale green plastic mask he wore on
the show, but his actual face.


- His t-shirt reads, "Warning: Do not attempt to drive or
operate heavy machinery after conversing with me."


- When Don Rickles calls him a "hockey puck," the NHL sues Don
Rickles for libel.

- He's wearing a button that says "Hi, My name is Mr. Personality!"

- The significance of his mask? He's a life member of the "KISS
Army."

-He had to give up stamp collecting -- the excitement was more than
he could handle.

- Your waiter fell asleep while taking his order.

- You met him in line for a Star Trek convention.

- His idea of a dinner-and-a-movie date: Bag of Chee-tos, six pack
of generic cola and naughty animations on his PDA.

- After three minutes with him, you can't get the "Theme from
M*A*S*H" out of your head.