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monkeyboy_ssj
13th August 2003, 13:09
Ok here's a little game that me and my mates play when we get bored, see who gets the most points in one week.

OFFICE DARES

Feeling bored in the office?

Looking for something new and exciting to do? Why not initiate an office dare system - however to do it properly only you are allowed to know the dare. Sound confusing? Well read on...

ONE-POINT OFFICE DARES

1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.
2) Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the toilet at the time).
3) Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.
4) Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."
5) To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.
6) When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, "Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!"
7) Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, "Sorry, I really prefer it this way".
8) Walk sideways to the photocopier.
9) While riding a lift, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

THREE-POINTS DARES
1) Say to your bosses boss (or the highest person you have access to), "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.
2) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, "Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it".
3) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).
4) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within sight).
5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

FIVE POINT DARES
1) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).
2) Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.
3) For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob".
4) Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two".
5) Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now".
6) While an office mate is out, move their chair into the lift.
7) In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!"
8) At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again".
9) In a colleague's diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".
10) Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask, "You wanna trade?"
11) Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it".
12) Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.
13) Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.
14) Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.
15) Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.
16) Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuit, smash each biscuit with your fist.
17) During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.
18) Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.

And if that wasn't enough for you...

1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
3) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4) Put your rubbish bin on your desk and label it "IN."
5) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
7) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
8) Don't use any punctuation
9) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
11) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
12) Sing along at the opera.
13) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
15) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
16) Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.
17) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!!"
18) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
19) Choose the most irritating person in a meeting & repeat every word they say in a high pitched voice whilst opening & closing the fingers of your right hand as if operating a glove puppet.

larsen_huw
13th August 2003, 13:13
Matt,

Those had me in tears of mirth ... everyone round me in the office is now wondering what the f**k i'm on .... and can they have some!:D

However, didn't some of those at the bottom come from The Log by Craig Charles?

StanLee
13th August 2003, 13:15
Matt, you should read Dilbert's books. One of them has office pranks that has been done. For example, one guy managed to get a copy of his office mate's car key; at every lunchtime, he'd go out and change the position of the car for a few months. The office mate ended up selling the car.

:D

monkeyboy_ssj
13th August 2003, 13:37
I LOVE Dilbert!

Most of the dares are stolen from somewhere but some are from the strange mind that is Matt!

This week i've 12 points...

Budoka 34
13th August 2003, 18:42
Matt,
I work with juvenile felons in a mental health setting. We have at least half that list every day! I wish I'd of thought to give em point for it!:D

I love my kids.

:smilejapa

Shitoryu Dude
14th August 2003, 04:06
I could get away with a lot of that - I'm already known as the guy who keeps things surreal in the name of keeping work interesting.

:beer:

A. M. Jauregui
14th August 2003, 07:41
What makes it more interesting is that there are signs all over the place stating that you are being surveilled at all times.

ONE-POINT OFFICE DARES
1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.

Done. It was a race.

2) Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the toilet at the time).

Done. I was pretending to get off... It was a dare...

6) When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, "Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!"

Done when I was just messing with some girl that has a crush on me. ;)

THREE-POINTS DARES
1) Say to your bosses boss (or the highest person you have access to), "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.

He is just so cool that it naturally happened.

5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

Sometime I am a bitch. :)

FIVE POINT DARES
1) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).

Where I work it has happened...

2) Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.

I really wanted to get his attention...

11) Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it".

No one gave me a double take.

14) Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.

Does holding your nose closed to change ones voice count? If so, I have done this.

And if that wasn't enough for you...
8) Don't use any punctuation

I have written memos and text messages sans punctuation.

monkeyboy_ssj
14th August 2003, 15:15
Ana, you are my hero. I think i'm in love with you...I really do...

;)

monkeyboy_ssj
14th August 2003, 16:30
I bet you get lots of foot rubs ;)

Shitoryu Dude
14th August 2003, 18:15
2) Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the toilet at the time).

Done. I was pretending to get off... It was a dare...

Pretending....? ;) Huh, that sort of takes the fun out of it.

BC
14th August 2003, 23:07
I have a friend who is like Harvey - does all kinds of stunts to liven things up in his workplace. The best story he's passed on was this.

His office door opens up to face a long hallway which ends with another group of female administrative personnel desks in an open area. One day he positioned his chair facing down the hallway, spread-eagled his legs, each propped up on the arms of the chair. Then he proceeded to pretend to pull out a long "marital aid" and go to town on himself, complete with undulating vibration sounds, for about five minutes. Then slams the door shut to the office. He had the admins laughing for a good twenty minutes.

He admits he can't believe what he gets away with at that place!

ZanShin2003
15th August 2003, 20:22
All this office stuff, reminded me of this article. Office Ninja. (http://www.theonion.com/onion3535/disgruntled_ninja.html)

Oh how I can see myself in this position someday! :D

-Colin Tranborg