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Kimpatsu
1st October 2003, 08:57
HARD-DISK woman: She remembers everything, FOREVER.
RAM woman: She forgets about you the moment you turn her off.

WINDOWS woman: Everyone knows that she can't do a thing right, but no one can live without her.

EXCEL woman: They say she can do a lot of things but you mostly use her for
your four basic needs.

SCREENSAVER woman: She is good for notjing but at least she is fun!

INTERNET woman: Difficult to access. // Everybody will access!!

SERVER woman: Always busy when you need her.

MULTIMEDIA woman: She makes horrible things look beautiful.

CD-ROM woman: She is always faster and faster.

E-MAIL woman: Of every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.

VIRUS woman: Also known as "wife"; when you are not expecting her, she comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if you don't try to uninstall her you will lose everything.

Martyn van Halm
1st October 2003, 15:34
Mine EXCELs.

Mike Williams
1st October 2003, 16:06
Confucius he say: Man who compare girlfriend to computer, probably single.

Cheers,

Mike

Kimpatsu
1st October 2003, 16:18
Originally posted by Mike Williams
Confucius he say: Man who compare girlfriend to computer, probably single.
Wise man say, he who compare girlfriend to computer have both by bedside, both with plenty of RAM... :D

Kimpatsu
1st October 2003, 16:18
Originally posted by Mike Williams
Confucius he say: Man who compare girlfriend to computer, probably single.
Wise man say, he who compare girlfriend to computer have both by bedside, both with plenty of RAM... :D

Kimpatsu
1st October 2003, 16:18
Originally posted by Mike Williams
Confucius he say: Man who compare girlfriend to computer, probably single.
Wise man say, he who compare girlfriend to computer have both by bedside, both with plenty of RAM... :D

Kimpatsu
1st October 2003, 16:18
Originally posted by Mike Williams
Confucius he say: Man who compare girlfriend to computer, probably single.
Wise man say, he who compare girlfriend to computer have both by bedside, both with plenty of RAM... :D

Kimpatsu
1st October 2003, 16:18
Originally posted by Mike Williams
Confucius he say: Man who compare girlfriend to computer, probably single.
Wise man say, he who compare girlfriend to computer have both by bedside, both with plenty of RAM... :D

Kimpatsu
1st October 2003, 16:18
Originally posted by Mike Williams
Confucius he say: Man who compare girlfriend to computer, probably single.
Wise man say, he who compare girlfriend to computer have both by bedside, both with plenty of RAM... :D

kage110
1st October 2003, 16:28
Wise man say, he who compare girlfriend to computer have both by bedside, both with plenty of RAM...

Tony, that was barely funny the first time I read it but six times???!! No need to RAM it down our throats...:p

Mike Williams
1st October 2003, 16:35
RAM = Repeatedly Adding Messages?

Cheers,

Mike

Ron Rompen
1st October 2003, 22:38
Hate to admit it, but mine is DEFINITELY virus-woman.Showed up unexpectedly, and WORMed her way into my life. Now my system is completely infected by her. She's proven completely impossible to delete, so I've learned to live with it :D

Kimpatsu
2nd October 2003, 00:33
Originally posted by kage110
Tony, that was barely funny the first time I read it but six times???!! No need to RAM it down our throats...:p [/B]
Ah, but do you swallow it? Hook, line, and sinker?
(Sorry... my PC threw a wobbly and I couldn't seem to post. Then, when I found out, the 15-minute edit window had passed, and I couldn't go back to correct the problem.)

shotofan
2nd October 2003, 01:19
Hard disk and virus... poor me!!!!!:p

mech
2nd October 2003, 06:08
Why women and computers are related?

None of them thinks, but what a memory!!


Mech

larsen_huw
2nd October 2003, 10:38
Hehe ...

My g/f's the 11th type:

The Unreliable Computer ...

Will always go down on you when you need them most!

:laugh: :laugh:

StanLee
2nd October 2003, 13:10
Hard disk definately...

Pissed her off last night by doing some extra training and going down the pub afterwards with sensei.

But I did give her a 45 minute massage to help erase that memory.

Kimpatsu
2nd October 2003, 13:27
Originally posted by larsen_huw
Will always go down on you when you need them most!
But when she BYTEs too hard, ouch!...

monkeyboy_ssj
2nd October 2003, 13:52
Originally posted by Mike Williams
RAM = Repeatedly Adding Messages?

Cheers,

Mike

He's just trying to bump his post number because he's no longer No.1 :D

Confucius he say: Man who walk through airport door sideways going to Bangkok.

My old missus was Linux, it's not on the list, but you can guess...

Cheers

oh, new thread idea!

Kimpatsu
2nd October 2003, 14:28
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
He's just trying to bump his post number because he's no longer No.1 :D
I'm always number 1, even if Lindsey has to cheat me out of my rightful place...

Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
oh, new thread idea!
Matt, don't lie. You don't get ideas. You have epiphanies... :D

monkeyboy_ssj
2nd October 2003, 14:38
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
I'm always number 1, even if Lindsey has to cheat me out of my rightful place...

Rightful place? I don't think Jon has got access to put you in a mental home.


Originally posted by Kimpatsu

Matt, don't lie. You don't get ideas. You have epiphanies... :D

:cry: tis true, tis true...:cry:

Kimpatsu
2nd October 2003, 15:08
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
Rightful place? I don't think Jon has got access to put you in a mental home.
The whole planet's a mental home, so no change there, then...

Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
:cry: tis true, tis true...:cry:
See? I can't be that mad, then, can I? :D

kwilfar
2nd October 2003, 15:50
a woman is like a computer, te value of both decreases a lot after u acquire them.


Luís Quintino

monkeyboy_ssj
2nd October 2003, 15:51
I'm quite surprised no one's made the usual 3.5 inch floppy/hard drive jokes...Cue Tony!

Kimpatsu
2nd October 2003, 16:09
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
I'm quite surprised no one's made the usual 3.5 inch floppy/hard drive jokes...Cue Tony!
I'm too busy emptying my cache...

shotofan
2nd October 2003, 17:13
LOL LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D :D :toast:

monkeyboy_ssj
2nd October 2003, 17:18
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
I'm too busy emptying my cache...

I've never heard it being called 'that' before...:D

Kimpatsu
3rd October 2003, 07:04
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
I've never heard it being called 'that' before...:D
And I am thinking that you are Pakistani...

monkeyboy_ssj
3rd October 2003, 10:09
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
And I am thinking that you are Pakistani...

???

I don't get the joke...or is it an honest question?

Kimpatsu
3rd October 2003, 11:01
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
???I don't get the joke...or is it an honest question?
Because I am be reading your bad grammar, am I am thinking that maybe you are be speaking English like that...

monkeyboy_ssj
3rd October 2003, 11:09
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
Because I am be reading your bad grammar, am I am thinking that maybe you are be speaking English like that...

A bit racist mate?

I never was taught grammar at school and I am semi-dyslectic. I read things through after I type them and they read fine, I go back to it 10 minutes later and have to edit half the post.

I usually catch most of them, but if I’m not paying attention then some do slip through.

Kimpatsu
3rd October 2003, 11:12
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
A bit racist mate?
Not at all. I was just playing up to the sterotype.

Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
I never was taught grammar at school and I am semi-dyslectic. I read things through after I type them and they read fine, I go back to it 10 minutes later and have to edit half the post.
How can one be semi-dyslexic? :confused:

monkeyboy_ssj
3rd October 2003, 11:18
Because it only happens sometimes...

It's hard to explain, at school I would be ok, but when I got excited my typing/ writting would not make any sense.

It works the same as how dyslexics cannot see mistakes when re-reading things due to them knowing what they want to write and seeing the word subconsciously on the page, even though it maybe wrong.

They recognised it at school, and had exercises that helped with it, like stopping after every 10 seconds of writting and re reading it. and then reading it out loud.

But I did not have learning difficulties and was well behaved so I did not have the usual sort.

Also my guess work for a spelling of a word is terrible, same sort of thing.

larsen_huw
3rd October 2003, 11:18
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
How can one be semi-dyslexic? :confused:


Tony,

I was told after my dyslexia test that i had dyslexic tendancies. However, they didn't feel it was bad enough to classify me as dsslexic (god .. that word really is hard to spell!). Basically i can't spell a word .... i have to learn the spelling .... any guess i make will almost certainly be wrong. I also confuse r's and f's when they appear in the same word .... forest and refer (often end up writing rofest and ferer ... before realising my mistake) being the two worst for me.

I assume it's similar for Matt.

monkeyboy_ssj
3rd October 2003, 11:20
Originally posted by larsen_huw
Tony,

I was told after my dyslexia test that i had dyslexic tendancies. However, they didn't feel it was bad enough to classify me as dsslexic (god .. that word really is hard to spell!). Basically i can't spell a word .... i have to learn the spelling .... any guess i make will almost certainly be wrong. I also confuse r's and f's when they appear in the same word .... forest and refer (often end up writing rofest and ferer ... before realising my mistake) being the two worst for me.

I assume it's similar for Matt.

It's sounds exactly the same...my school was terrible for teaching proper English, they taught us poetry instead.

Cheers

Rogier
3rd October 2003, 11:23
E-MAIL woman: Of every ten things she says, eight are nonsense

isn't that true for every woman?? :D

monkeyboy_ssj
3rd October 2003, 11:26
Originally posted by Rogier
isn't that true for every woman?? :D

personally I think 8/10 is a bit forgiving to them :D