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william northcote
14th January 2004, 22:37
Lets have one. Should be fun. Lets say something silly like, if flatulance had a colour, what would it be?

then we could show how bored we are at work, home, University, office, halfway up Ben Machdui mountian looking for a haggis, by debating it in a humorous manner reminisant of Budo fun.

So who wants to start this thread off?

elder999
14th January 2004, 23:51
Originally posted by Will Northcote
Lets have one. Should be fun. Lets say something silly like, if flatulance had a colour, what would it be?



We used to say (upon farting): "Catch that one, and paint it purple!"

If brown duck, then why seven?

larsen_huw
15th January 2004, 09:05
Ancient Japanese Wiseman once say:

He who have hole in pocket, will feel cocky all day

monkeyboy_ssj
16th January 2004, 09:52
Man who walk through airport sideways going to Bangkok...

william northcote
16th January 2004, 10:02
Man having safe sex is in danger of getting trapped by the hinges.

Kimpatsu
17th January 2004, 04:21
Confucious say, if chain swinging, toilet seat still warm.

william northcote
23rd January 2004, 09:58
A bird in the hand will alwys leave you with a messy wrist.

larsen_huw
23rd January 2004, 15:43
A bird with a good hand is worth 2 with a bad bush.

jaxonbrown
4th March 2004, 14:01
lo wang say:
man who fart in church sit in own pew
man who stand on toilet high on pot

i dont remember any more of them

william northcote
12th March 2004, 10:49
A man that is so full of himself needs to partake in organ donation schemes.

Men have walked on the moon, but find it hard to run to McDonalds.

aiki_uke
4th April 2004, 23:47
Why do you park in a driveway and drive in a parkway???

aiki_uke
4th April 2004, 23:49
What are hotdogs made of???

aiki_uke
4th April 2004, 23:55
If time is money and money is the root of all evil,
does time2 =evil???

(2 should be superscript... sorry)

Skip Cooper
5th April 2004, 06:28
Originally posted by aiki_uke
Why do you park in a driveway and drive in a parkway???

Here's one:
If a package is transported by water/air it is called cargo.
If a package is transported by road/rail it is called a shipment.


Is it wetter under water when it rains?

tsurashi shondo
5th April 2004, 07:57
what is the sound of one nose picking?

larsen_huw
5th April 2004, 09:54
Originally posted by tsurashi shondo
what is the sound of one nose picking?

[michael jackson voice] ooo .... i think i'll have that one ..... no, no, no ... silly me that one's too pointy ..... i'll go for this one thanks mister plastic surgeon.[/michael jacksom voice]

monkeyboy_ssj
6th April 2004, 22:04
Originally posted by larsen_huw
[michael jackson voice] ooo .... i think i'll have that one ..... no, no, no ... silly me that one's too pointy ..... i'll go for this one thanks mister plastic surgeon.[/michael jacksom voice]

:laugh:

I was thinking along the lines of

"Shhhhlllller pertwag! Ah nose goblin!"

cheers!

william northcote
7th April 2004, 10:37
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
:laugh:

I was thinking along the lines of

"Shhhhlllller pertwag! Ah nose goblin!"

cheers!

Maybe Jackson should sue Mortis for the fake nose thing.

william northcote
7th April 2004, 11:06
Does the strange math work with men also?

william northcote
7th April 2004, 11:29
and there was I thinking that the root of all evil was me.

*Dejected sigh* [looks depressed]

Cody
7th April 2004, 12:14
Never mind me, I think I am getting too surreal XD

Indeed, girls = evil, no uncertainly :D

nicojo
7th April 2004, 19:39
girls = rt(evil)^2
girls = evil OR girls = -evil
so they are either evil or they are not.


Nice.

william northcote
20th May 2004, 08:53
If you lay all the prostitutes end to end, it would still rain in Glasgow :mad:

monkeyboy_ssj
20th May 2004, 11:17
Black! Black like the inside of a coffin on a moonless night! They lock me in the cellar and feed me pins!

robot70
20th May 2004, 11:26
If i cloned myself, changed the y chromosome to an x chromosome (thus making the Me-clone female), and then had sex with her, would it be masturbation, or incest?

larsen_huw
20th May 2004, 11:53
Originally posted by Will Northcote
If you lay all the prostitutes end to end, it would still rain in Glasgow :mad:

true ... but getting there would be more amusing! :laugh:

william northcote
20th May 2004, 11:58
If a man walked into a bar, would he say "ouch" or "now there is a strange place to keep a heavy metal object..."

william northcote
26th June 2004, 23:34
I thought of bumping this thread back to the top, but err... blow me, I seem to have done it already. So as a fully qualified yet unemployed writer I demand the 10% of all royalties by reading this piece of nonsense and drivel. I thank you.

Now who want's to buy a used, slightly soiled teapot?

aplonis
13th August 2004, 09:58
2B + !(2B)

The Nephilim
13th August 2004, 10:03
Originally posted by aplonis
2B + !(2B)

No thanks, I would rather use a biro.

Kimpatsu
13th August 2004, 13:48
Originally posted by The Nephilim
No thanks, I would rather use a biro.
Stop being in pen in the arse, and get the led out of your arse instead...
(Do not diss this joke; it's write on.) :D

monkeyboy_ssj
13th August 2004, 13:52
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
Stop being in pen in the arse, and get the led out of your arse instead...
(Do not diss this joke; it's write on.) :D

The penis mighter than the sword...

(The space is purposefully not there :D)

Kimpatsu
13th August 2004, 14:07
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
The penis mighter than the sword...
Stop being a prick...

monkeyboy_ssj
13th August 2004, 14:10
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
Stop being a prick...

Nice try at humour but it was a stab in the dark...

Kimpatsu
13th August 2004, 14:14
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
Nice try but it was a stab in the dark...
To be blunt, I always knew you were trying to knife me from behind...

monkeyboy_ssj
13th August 2004, 14:15
Originally posted by Kimpatsu
I always knew you were trying to knife me from behind...

That's not a knife :D

*you're my friend*

Amphinon
13th August 2004, 15:09
Baseball all wrong - Man with 4 balls can't walk!

Kimpatsu
13th August 2004, 15:12
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
That's not a knife :D

*you're my friend*
So you're trying to stuff me?
With a blunt instrument, no less?!

monkeyboy_ssj
13th August 2004, 15:17
Originally posted by Amphinon
Baseball all wrong - Man with 4 balls can't walk!

Man who walk through airport door sideways going to bangkok.

:D

Kimpatsu
13th August 2004, 15:20
Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
Man who walk through airport door sideways going to bangkok.
:D
If toilet chain still swinging, toilet seat still warm...

Brian Owens
14th August 2004, 09:47
Originally posted by aplonis
2B + !(2B)
That is the question.

The Nephilim
15th August 2004, 09:31
Originally posted by Yagyu Kenshi
That is the question.

So what is the answer?

Kimpatsu
15th August 2004, 09:32
Originally posted by The Nephilim
So what is the answer?
Whether it be nobler in the mind to take up arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing, end them, of course.

Brian Owens
15th August 2004, 09:43
Originally posted by The Nephilim
So what is the answer?
What Tony said.

Also whether one should endure the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or something like that. :D

The Nephilim
15th August 2004, 12:08
"Ah IC" said I trying not to use much of the keyboard as possable.

Kimpatsu
15th August 2004, 15:48
Originally posted by The Nephilim
"Ah IC" said I trying not to use much of the keyboard as possable.
What's a possum got to do with it. Use as much of the keyboard as possible; it extends your options.
:D

Paul Kerr
15th August 2004, 16:01
What are you not thinking about?

2groggy
15th August 2004, 22:36
"Daddeee, I want to aks you something... Spiderman eats flies."

Greg Dow

Brian Owens
15th August 2004, 22:58
Originally posted by Paul Kerr
What are you not thinking about?
Elephants; because it's further to London than it is by train.

The Nephilim
16th August 2004, 06:47
Originally posted by Paul Kerr
What are you not thinking about?

Never ask what I am thinking aobut.

The Nephilim
18th August 2004, 14:44
Originally posted by Paul Kerr
What are you not thinking about?

but if you wish to find out, send a SAE to:

The Nephilim
P.O. Box 295
Wetwang
North Yorkshire
N30 6XY

All replies will help the fire start in the morning.

Kimpatsu
18th August 2004, 15:27
Originally posted by The Nephilim
Wetwang
Now we know where you hang out...
I'm sure there's a joke in there somewhere...

The Nephilim
18th August 2004, 22:41
It is a real town in North Yorkshire. If you go from Wakefield to Scarbrough on the East coast you go near or through Wetwang.

The joke has been done before by in the Douglas Adams book, The meaning of Liff. Look up the joke in there.

william northcote
14th July 2005, 13:29
Stairs are good if there is another floor above you. Would be pointless having another floor without them in.

monkeyboy_ssj
14th July 2005, 14:08
HARK! my nipples explode with the light!

william northcote
14th July 2005, 14:50
Plant cotton wool sticks into the bases of a goldfish tank.
that way they have something useful to clean their a$$ on.

william northcote
15th July 2005, 22:36
A tip for Warewolf fanatics:

Superglue a paper plate to the bedroom window for that full moon feeling.