Fun with Mr. Abacha

[Soulend]

Finally, after years of waiting, I got my very own 419 Scam (http://www.419eater.com/html/419faq.htm) e-mail. Rather than simply waste the opportunity by deleting it though, I decided to have some fun and post our correspondence in this thread for general amusement value. I will keep it updated, and hopefully it will prove pretty entertaining. Feel free to offer suggestions as to what to write to the idiot next:

Dear Friend,

I am Mrs. Mariam. Abacha, the widow of General Sani Abacha the Late
Nigerian
Head of State.

I am presently in distress and under house arrest while my son Mohammed
is undergoing trial in Lagos and Abuja though he has just been recently
granted bail under the condition that my family refunds to the Federal
Government
some amount of money.

The government has frozen all the family account and auctioned all our
properties.

To save the family from total bankruptcy I plan to Transfer through an
Financial
Institution,the sum of US24, 000,000.00. secretly kept by my late
husband.

The money was deposited with a Security/Finance Institution.

However,because of the security Watch on me,i may not be able to carry
out
this Transaction with you.Please contact my Son Abba Abacha on his
e-mail
address:bar_ab01@myway.com and my Son shall arrange with you,toward`s
effective
completion of this transaction.

Conclusively, we have agreed to offer you 30% of the total sum while
70%
is to be held on trust by you until we decide on a suitable business
investment
in your country subsequent to our free movement by the Nigerian
Government.

Endeavour to send your phone and fax numbers for easy Communications.
This
project is not risky.Contact my Son bar_ab01@myway.com

Sincerely Yours,

Mrs. Mariam Abacha(Dr.)

My response to "Mariam Abacha's Son":

Dear Mr. Abba Abacha,

I have recently been contacted by your mother, a Mrs. Mariam Abacha, concerning your family's unfortunate situation, and I would like to help in any way I can.

My name is James Hetfield, and I am the CEO of MicroFlute Industries, Ltd. We manufacture microprocessors for computer and security equipment, as well as distribute Pork Statues through our distributor, Meat Whistles, Unlimited. I am a fairly wealthy man, however, I am always open to new and lucrative business opportunities such as yours.

Please outline for me exactly what this transaction will entail via e-mail before I divulge my fax and telephone number. As my company also has several contracts with the United States Air Force, for both computers and ballsax, you can understand my caution, I am sure.

I sincerely look forward to specific details concerning your proposed arrangement.

James Hetfield
CEO MicroFlute Industries
Hilton Head, S.C.

More to follow..

[Soulend]

Dear James Hetfield,

Thank`s for your reply to my Mothers Proposal.

Like sheexpalined,i am a Son to this family.And as a Good Son,i will do all within my Power to safe Guard our interest.So if you must work with me,then you must be ready to follow my Instruction`s and be Honest with me too.

My Friend,like my Mother already explained this Money is in a Finance/Security Institution in Europe.And we are ready to have this Money Transferred to you as an Oversea Partner to this Family,by first of all making you Beneficiary of the said Money.

As you can see,this is a Huge Amount of Money.So i will do everything to make sure that we have a Hitch Free Transfer of this Money to you,for Possible Investment by you on behalf of our Family(The Abachas).

I will need you to send to me immediately,the following Detail`s:

1:Full Name
2:Complete Address
3:Company Name&Address
4:Tel/Fax Number`s
5:Age

With the above Information`s,the Lawyer shall get the Document`s that will be needed in making you Beneficiary of this Money.

I will want you to understand that,our Family has agreed to give you 30% for your assistance.And they will also be needing your assistance to Invest there 70%,share for Security reason`s.


I shall await your reply.

Regard`s,
Abba Abacha.

Reply:

My Dear Mr. Abacha,

I think we may be getting ahead of ourselves here. I am sure that you understand what a delicate transaction this is, and as a businessman I like to know who I am dealing with. Before I can send you my personal details, I would like to know who I am about to enter into a business agreement with. Kindly send me a picture of yourself holding a sign with my company's name on it (MicroFlute) so that I know that I am dealing with the real Mr. Abba Abacha.

I am sincerely interested in completing this transfer and assisting you in the investment of the 70% share of the 24,000,000 ($16,800,000). I have a number of very profitable investments available both here in the United States and in the Far East which may interest you. I also have some beef cattle concerns in Argentina that are doing very well, as the price of Tube Steak has gone through the roof!

As a mark of good faith, I have attached a picture of myself. I anxiously await your picture so that we may continue with this transaction.

Attached picture:

[Soulend]

At this point, it seems that I requested his picture a bit too soon (before I dangled a carrot before him), so he refused. I'll save it for later.

At length I replied:

Dear Abba,

On further consideration I have decided to give you the information you require and proceed. I simply do not see why it is such a problem to allow me to put a face with a name, when we are talking about millions of dollars here, and especially when I agreed to try and help at the request of your dear mother. I hope that you can find in your heart to be somewhat less aggressive with me so that we may move ahead in a friendly manner.

I am showing my trust in you and your family by providing my details, and I only ask the same level of trust and friendship in return.

I would like you to know that my hearing is not good as a result of an unfortunate smelting accident and that I am unable to use a regular telephone. I can use a TextPhone however - do you have access to one of these? If not, my voicemail system below can interpret voice messages for me. You can also fax me using this number.

Name: James Randi Hetfield
Home Address: 21 Hammett Dr
Hilton Head, SC, USA 29938

Business Address: MicroFlute Ind. Attn: James Hetfield
713 CliffBurton Circle
Hilton Head, SC, USA 29938

Tel/Fax: (206) 350-08**

Age: 42

There, I have shown enough trust to give you my personal details. I await your hopefully friendly reply.

God Bless You,



James Hetfield
CEO MicroFlute Industries
Hilton Head, S.C.


The telephone/fax number is a free service from www.k7.net. The addresses completely random with a Metallica-related street address.

[Soulend]

Dear Mr James,


I am not trying to be aggressive,its just that our future lies on this Money and as such i need to ber very carefull about whom i am dealing with.

To Confirm your willingness to assist us,forward to me at once a Copy of my ID.So i do not mistake you as some people that have betrayed us to to the Government in the past,i am sorry about this,

You have to prrove your Honesty to me,afterall you stand to gain 30% of this Money.

So I sent him, suitably sized and indistinct:

[Soulend]

Dear James,

Thank you so very much for the ID you have forwarded to me,i assure the safety of your Informations in my care.

James,like i have already explained.I will do my best to make sure that we have a Hitch Free Transaction here,and this can only be achieved when you follow my Instructions strictly and keeping this Confidential.

I shall forward your Informations to the Lawyer tomorrow,so he can carry out Documentation process of making you first Beneficiary of the said Funds.

You are quite aware of the Nature of Transactions of this Magnitude,they should be Treated as Higly Confidential Matters.I will assure you that with your Complete Cooperation,we shall have this concluded before the end of next week.

Will you be able to Travel to Europe in person,so as to Claim the Funds directly from there?I will prefer this option,due toe the (9/11) experience in America,we will want to avoid a situation where Questions will come up when Funds of this Amount are Deposited once in your Account.If you you unable,that will still not be a problem as the Funds can still be Transferred.

James,i will also want you to understand that.We do not only need your assistance in recieving this Money,we will also need your assistance in acquiring a New Home where we intend to settle after now and also Invest our share of the Money.

James,i will try and call you right away to notify you of this mail.I advise that we maintain a very effective form of Communication,check and respond to mails at least twice a day.

Expect my call.

Mr Abba.


Dear Abba,

Of course everything shall be kept extremely confidential, as the amount of money may cause me tax problems as well unless this transaction is handled with the utmost care.

Travel will not be a problem, but this will require some time - a week at the very least. As you recall, I have a business here and I cannot simply pack up and leave on a moment's notice. Or the funds can simply be transferred, at which point I can transfer them to an off-shore account for safety's sake. It is up to you how you want it done.

I will expect your message.

God Bless You,
-James

From Abba:

Dear James,

Thanks for your mail.

I will want you to understand that,we are very much Comfortable with your arrangement of been able to Travel with at least a weeks Notice.I will prefer you Travelling to Europe,as we will not want any problem like i earler explained.

James,what will happen is that.As soon as you are made Beneficiary of this Money,i will let you have the Contact Informations of Company in Europe so you may contact them personally.Then you will be able to finmd out from them directly,what will be required of you in recieving this Money.

My Client has advised that whatever we spend we should take record of,so at the end of the Day we will get back all we have spent.

He obviously has lapsed into 'pretending to be his own lawyer' mode prematurely, so I point this out:

Dear Mr. Abacha,

Very well. What country are these funds held in? I need to see about securing a visa for entry. I notice you said "my client" at the end of your message. What "client" is this?

-James


I have a pretty good idea of where this is going to go and what I'm going to do - but does anyone have any suggestions that while pretty funny aren't obvious enough to make him give up? :D

[Jamie Stokes]

hmmm, heard of one guy doing something similar to you.

What he asked for was when he met the individuals in the hotel, he wanted them to book the hotel, and so as to make sure he didn't miss any training time for the nest olympic tri-event equestrian trials, could they please have a white horse available at the hotel so he could train according to his coaches directives.

you could say something that just tugs at the edges of reality, then wind it up a notch.

Personally, I'd ask for a team of horses, as for the chinese olympics chariot racing will be reintroduced as a spectator event, and in traing for it.

dont worry about cars or anything, just go over the top.

Happy hunting.
Jamie.

ps would also tie in to at least a weeks notice, as this is one of your diverse interests as a businessman.

Given your photo, I see you more as a rider of rohan viking on horse back.

[joe yang]

You still haven't set the hook. You need to give Abba a glimpse of your crooked side to really encourage him. It is so much easier to cheat a crook. You might open the door to all kinds of screwy cloak and dagger stuff.

[Jamie Stokes]

Joe, cool idea!

connections with a "famiily business man" who is in [dubious political country of choice] who would also like an interest!

Better then horses.

Jamie

[monkeyboy_ssj]

David, don't take this the wrong way...but you are an utter bastard!

Good going! :D

Shame you can't track where the email is coming from...I dare say they are not in africa :rolleyes:

Let us know how it goes! :D

Cheers

[Soulend]

Thanks guys. I have been looking for an opening, scanning bunches of examples at http://www.geocities.com/scamjokepage/ and http://www.419eater.com/html/letters.htm

Unlike their 419'ers though, who seem really desperate and accomodating, this guy's really demanding and appears ready to drop the whole business if you push him. Since my company develops microprocessors, I was going to pretend to bring him a state of the art laptop as a gift, playing on his greed.

OK, so I should possibly introduce a third (crooked) party...I already had an e-mail account set up for my "lawyer" (Erik Shun, Esq. of the Loot, Plunder, and Shun law firm) should he come into play later. Any suggestions as to how to go about setting this hook, Joe?

[monkeyboy_ssj]

I still find it hard to believe when they use email accounts that are based in the US, e.g. @myway.com that he uses operates from this address.

Focus Interactive Inc
One Bridge Street
Suite 42
Irvington, NY 10467
US

Surely he would be using an African email address provider? ;)

Cheers

[Soulend]

Apparently most of these do in fact originate in Nigeria. MyWay seems to simply be a sort of web-based email, like Yahoo or Hotmail; probably used by people all over the world. His originating IP, 80.179.107.252, seems to be coming from Israel or possibly Egypt (my trace software sucks for foreign IP's).

Incidentally, he swapped to a Yahoo account after my first e-mail to the MyWay one...

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
Apparently most of these do in fact originate in Nigeria. MyWay seems to simply be a sort of web-based email, like Yahoo or Hotmail; probably used by people all over the world. His originating IP, 80.179.107.252, seems to be coming from Israel or possibly Egypt (my trace software sucks for foreign IP's).

Ah fair play...

It just makes me wonder if anyone is really that stupid to fall for it!

Oh well, see how long you can string it out for...I'm just amazed he's never heard of Metallica before ;)

Cheers

[Soulend]

Hehe...I got the idea from the guy at the Scam Joke Page. He always responds as David Lee Roth, complete with picture. One I recall he even had the band and the VH logo in it and the scammer still didn't catch on..

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
Hehe...I got the idea from the guy at the Scam Joke Page. He always responds as David Lee Roth, complete with picture. One I recall he even had the band and the VH logo in it and the scammer still didn't catch on..

Diamond Dave is my hero! :D

Cheers

[joe yang]

David, go with what feels right, offer him the lap top, make it state of the art, be really proud of it, maybe too proud of it, like it is more than the latest prototype, like maybe you "appropriated" it from company stock, and you are dying to tell him, but that wouldn't be cool, so you want him to fiqure it out and you keep ofering him hints. The big picture is, you are suggesting you don't really believe his story, you believe he has the money, and you are interested in getting a hold of some, because you are greedy, but you don't believe his story. that should make it easier for him to string you along. And I like the Port of Marsielle (SP?) for a sleazy reandevous. :D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Hmmm, I just looked up his Ip Address (80.179.107.252) and it does say it's from Lagos, Nigirea...wait! Maybe it's true!!! :D

I used this little webpage, quite good, just put the address in the box.

http://www.geobytes.com/IpLocator.htm

Cheers

[BC]

You might work in some complicating issues such as one of your companies is fighting against a corporate takeover from some deviant/pornographic company headed by your ex-transgender-life partner, Amanda Huggenkist, and his/her present mate, Seymor Cox, who were recently wed in Massachusets or San Francisco.

You get the idea...

[pgsmith]

That's pretty funny David!
My suggestion would be to try and turn the worm. See if you can get him to register a dummy company in Europe that you can be partners in as you have a need to "invest" some of your own company's profits rather soon, before the audit. Perhaps you can get his greed up and get him to take care of setting up the account and such!

Regardless of how it goes, keep us up to date on the fun!

[Chuck.Gordon]

Mr Craik,

You are my hero
You are the wind beneath my wings ...

Rock on, dude!

:D :D :D


Chuck

[Bill Gallant]

The 5th estate, (Canada's 60 minutes), did a program on these guys earlier this year. They went to Europe, The Netherlands I think, where there are slums full of African immigrants doing these scams from basements.
They meet the guys and in the end when they realized that they were reporters from Canada they threatened to kill them.
Be carefull.

[Soulend]

Thanks guys. Yeah, in 1995 some guy went to Nigeria on one of these scams and was killed.

Today I get:

Dear James,

The Funds in Question are in the UK,and i will want to get a Confirmation from you on how soon you can be there.

I will want you to understanmd that,apart from the fact that you have been made Beneficiary of the said Funds.There are certain task that we expect you to carry out on our behalf before release of Funds to you,this is due to the fact that there are some Charges that you will be needed to settle as a result of the long time of Funds with them.

I am not in a position to really explain all of these,but James you will get Clarification from the Officials in UK when i forward there contact Informations to you on your readiness to make the Trip to UK.

I will want to hear from you.

So here comes the "charges that I will need to settle". I'm so tempted to simply sniff the IP of these "Officials in the UK" (who will really be in Nigeria, as it's going to be ol' Mr. Abacha himself) and confront them with it. But, of course that will ruin the fun...

[DingoWallaby]

Check out

http://www.scamorama.com/

One guy got $100 from some of the scammers!

[Soulend]

Cool, I'll check it out! One of the guys at 419 eater got $80.

My reply to above:

My Dear Abba,

My company is currently working on a rather large contract for M.E.A.T. curtains, and the earliest I will be able to travel is at the end of this month. I cannot raise people's suspicions with such a delicate matter involving such a large amount of money. Is this acceptable to you, Abba?

I was wondering if you would meet me in the U.K., or send an associate. My company is working on a new laptop computer which is extremely powerful, and includes an on-board (removable) digital camera. It uses a new type of graphics technology as well. It hasn't been released on the market yet, but I have three samples and thought I could perhaps bring it along as a gift for you and your family. I am sure you would be very pleased, and it is the least I can do for such a large amount of money you are trusting me with. I will of course be bringing skin flutes for you and your dear mother as well as any children you may have.

I am happy to pay any charges involved with the transfer of the funds; will it be possible to bring these funds with me or should they be sent to the financial institution? Either way is good. I was also wondering if a dummy company can be set up in either Europe or Nigeria in order to place these funds for a time. I am going to be audited by the I.R.S. tax service soon, and it will be difficult to hide these funds. Can you or the financial institution help me with this? My attorneys, Mr. Erik Shun and Ms. Amanda Huggenkiss advise that I do this.

Are there any documents that I need to fill out before I leave? Just let me know what I need to do. I am VERY excited about this.

Greetings of the Day,
James

Figure I can get a little more demanding once the 'financial institution' wants some money....

[GreySilk]

brilliant...but in reality..they could use the so called "lawyers" to setup off shore accounts and have the lawyers get the bail money and all that....


just wonder how many dumb people feel for this crap.

[David T Anderson]

Y'know, I've tried this sort of thing a few times, but my return emails always bounce. Either I'm doing something very wrong, or the scammers that approach me are too stupid to breath without instructions...

Actually, 95% of all the spam I get is nonsensical gibberish...what are those idiots smoking, anyway?

[Iain]

The sad thing is they wouldn't be doing it if it didn't work...

I always figured that if there are people dumb enough to do it, there are people dumb enough to fall for it. Oh, and keep up the good work!

[Soulend]

Thanks Iain. I may be about to lose him, as he's getting a bit demanding and irritating:

Dear James,

We cannot wait for that long to have this whole thing resolved,i will prefer a situation where this can be settled before the end of the Month.

What kind of Dummy Company are you talking about here,do you mean Registering a Company Name and Bank Account so the Funds can be Deposited there?If this is what you want,it can be done in other parts of Africa but definitely not in Nigeria.

I want a Copy of your International Passport and a picture of the Laptop sent to me via email attachment,so i can at least show to my Mother.

So I'm thinking about sending the following:

Dear Mr. Abacha,

That's funny, before you said that if I couldn't travel whatsoever that it would be okay to transfer the funds, now you say that it must be before the end of the month. Remember this?:

"Will you be able to Travel to Europe in person,so as to Claim the Funds directly from there?I will prefer this option,due toe the (9/11) experience in America,we will want to avoid a situation where Questions will come up when Funds of this Amount are Deposited once in your Account.If you you unable,that will still not be a problem as the Funds can still be Transferred."

So why is this a problem now? I run a corporation and cannot simply disappear. I fully intend to travel to the UK to complete the transaction but I am not risking my company or the attention of the police to do so. You must understand that I am also going to take a big risk moving this amount of money, and I fully intend to help you with investments and the purchase of a new home. How about if I authorize my lawyer with full powers of attorney to conduct this transaction in my name? He is extremely trustworthy, and can help us with investing the money and other matters as well.

I am talking about setting up a fake company and bank account in order to deposit these funds out of the country for a period of about two weeks. Do not worry, I will still have complete control of the money, but I do not want it seized by the government for tax evasion. If you wish to contact my lawyer who may be able to assist, Mr. Erik Shun, his e-mail is ErikShun@****.net

For what reason do you require my passport and a picture of my gift? You will not even send me a picture of yourself! I have sent all my information and my ID to you and you give me nothing. I know absolutely nothing about you. You haven't even called like you said. I will be more than happy to send you not only a picture of my passport, but my flight reservation and skinflute as well - when you send me a picture of yourself, preferably holding a sign which says 'MicroFlute' - the name of my company. I have, however, included a picture of the laptop to show your dear mother. We are also developing a new satellite phone which you may be interested in having and trying out - you have unlimited calls, all local, because it is tied by satellite to the area you are calling. So you can call overseas and it is the same as calling a number in Lagos.

Please stop fooling around, Abba. This must be a partnership, not you simply giving orders. Have the Financial Company send me any required documents and the fees I need to pay, and let's continue. By the way, do I pay these fees in person when I arrive or can I wire them to the financial company?

-Dave

Too strong, not strong enough? I've had a few so perhaps some advice before I send it?

Laptop, with HP logo suitably obscured (anyone got a picture of an incredible-looking customized laptop?):

[Iain]

hmmm. I wouldn't go as far as to point out the fact that he's obviously contradicted himself. It makes you look a little too smart. It begs the question of why you can spot that, but would fall for something as stupid as email bank fraud.

If I were you, I'd simply cave in to him, try and muster up as much of the info as you can and stall him for the rest. Keep asking him for the picture though, and make a more severe point of how accomodating you have been thus far. Sound desperate and apologetic about not being able to make it earlier rather than coming across as preoccupied. If you appear fawning and conciliatory, he might back off a little on the aggressive edge.

I like the bit about the obligations to your company, though. Keep it, but make it seem as if you're willing to risk the heat for him and come out in three weeks rather than waiting for your own sake.

Keep hitting him up for pics and info, though. That is -after all- the point of the exercise. Remember, this whole thing is BS, so don't get caught playing a power game with him unless you think it's going to get you something. You can send him a big **** YOU email when it's all said and done.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

M.E.A.T. curtains?!?

:laugh:

*spits coffee all over the monitor*

Fantastic!

[Soulend]

After sending him a revised, more accomodating version, I get:

Dear James,

I need the Passport for Security reasons,i could not get a Pic of the Lap-Top you sent.Please resend it along with the Passport,as we are Entrusting our future in your Hands.

I can have a Friend in Ivory-Coast set up this Company Name and Account on your behalf,though is currently out of his Country i believe he can still handle it.This will Cost you some Money,are you prepared to spend your Money in getting this set up for you?

Waiting.

NB:Are you Dave or James,you wrote Dave at the end of your last mail.


Whoops. Better think of something fast...

My Dear Abba,

As I mentioned, I will send a scan of my passport when I receive your picture. I have attached the laptop again.

I will pay any charges incurred for setting up this company if your friend can do it. Please stress to him that this company is only a 'front', not a real one. Perhaps the company can be set up as a charity, as these are usually tax exempt. Since I about to be very rich, I don't see a problem with fronting the money for it.

Sorry about the "Dave" thing. I was typing to my good friend Dave Mustaine on Yahoo Messenger at the same time I was writing the e-mail, and I must have typed in the wrong window.

[Soulend]

Dear James,

Thanks for your mail and Scan Lap-Top.

My Friend has assured me that he can have this Set-Up in Ivory-Coast,but like i explained he is currently in Canada for a Seminar.He Confirm to me that Registering a Charyity Organization in Ivory Coast and Opening an Account too will Cost some Money,he told me that the Account(since it will be in us$) will Cost $1,000 and the Registeration of Company will Cost as high as $1,500.

If you can handle this Expenses,then i will let you have Instructions on how send the Money to him in Canada.

..........

Dear Abba,

These expenses do not sound very bad. Please give me your friend's contact information in order to get him these funds. Of course I will need to see some sort of I.D. before I can send any money, and I'm sure there are documents that I will need to fill out, so I hope he has access to a scanner.

God Bless You,
-James

[GreySilk]

hmm...any chance of running any programs to see where it's originating from? other the lagos?? maybe crack his email address and see if there's anything there?

[Jamie Stokes]

This thread is slowly growing.

Visions of frankensteins monster, a can of worms, stuff like that

Jamie.

Afterthought- if his ISP is found, surely there are some evil little techno types who can wreak mischief with it.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

We already found his ISP and checked it and he is in Lagos...

[Rogier]

very cool... and it's not like you haven't been giving hints that what you're telling him is all bs..

keep doing the good thing :D

[The Nephilim]

The BBC did another report on this last year. they met the 419 people of African decent in Holland and then told them that their money was buried under a tree (they point to a tree after a small walk round the local park), and pursuaded them to dig there. They soon gave up.

So as far as brains Go David has the upper hand.

[Cady Goldfield]

I can't believe how long you've been stringing this out, Dave. Too cool. :laugh: :nw:

[Soulend]

Well, unfortunately it looks like I lost ol' Abba. But the good news is that I posted my e-mail on a bunch of guestbooks and now I have literally hundreds of Nigerians from which to choose. It worked so well that I posted Mr. Abacha's e-mail on about 50 of them as well, perhaps he can strike a deal with one of his countrymen.

So, I found myself a new one...suitably desperate, royal, and compliant..and thus way more entertaining..Miss Princess Ajana!


Good Day and Compliments,

I am writing this letter in confidence believing that
if it is the wish of God for you to help me and my
family, God almighty will bless and reward you
abundantly. My family and I are true Christians and
worship's God truthfully. I got your contact through
Internet during my research on some one who could help
us.
I am a female student from University of Nigeria,
Lagos. I am 23 yrs old. I'd like any person who can be
caring, loving and home oriented. I will love to have
a long-term relationship with you and to know more
about you. I would like to build up a solid foundation
with you in time coming if you can be able to help me
in this transaction.
Well, my fathers died some few months ago and left
my mother I and my junior brother behind. He was a
king, which our town citizens titled him before his
death. I was a Princess to him and I and my brother
are the only people who can take Care of his wealth
now because my mother is not literate enough to know
all my father's wealth behind.
He left up to USD 27, 350, 000.00 dollars (TWENTY
SEVEN MILLION, THREE HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND US
DOLLARS) with a security company, and I don't know how
and what I will do to invest this money somewhere in
abroad, so that my father's kindred will not take over
what belongs to my father and our family, which they
were planning to do without my present because I am a
female as stated by our culture in the town. That is
why I felt happy when I saw your contact which I
strongly believe that by the grace of God, you will
help me secure and invest this money. I thereby need
your help in bringing the box contaning the money out
from the security company, based on your reply I will
furnish you with more details on how we can proceed.
I am ready to pay 30% of the total amount to you if
you help us in securing this money and another 10%
interest of Annual Income to you, for handling
this business for us, which you will strongly have
absolute control over.
If you can handle this project sincerely and also
willing to assist me in lifting this fund, kindly reach me and I will
let you know the next step to
take towards actualizing this transaction as quickly
as possible.
Please, note that this transaction is 100% risk free.
I look forward hearing from you soonest.
Yours sincerely,
Miss Princess Ajana

[Soulend]

So, I send her the same ol' fake ID and info and get:

[nicojo]

Sweet, dude, she's a christian.

I'm sure, given your upbringing, Mr. Hetfield, you will have fun with that. Hope things work out!

By the way, did I tell you how much I love your remake of "Whiskey in the Jar" off the Garage Days EP?

Keep on rocking.

[Soulend]

and... (linked to prevent eating up e-budo bandwidth)

Mother and Ken (http://www.geocities.com/warriorcreed/motherandken.jpg )

and even the death certificate!

http://www.geocities.com/warriorcreed/DeathCertificate.jpg

Now this one could be interesting, so I reply...

May God Bless you and Your Family,

Thank you for your pictures, I will do what I can to help. May I say that you are a very beautiful lady. I would like you to know, though, that my hearing is not good due to an unfortunate smelting accident. I cannot even hear when my dear wife plays the 'Slobber Blues' on the skin flute! And she's so talented. So I cannot call, unfortunately.

Nonetheless, I can use a TextPhone if you have access to one of these. If not, you can leave a message at the number listed below, and the system will translate it into text for me. You can also fax to this number.


Name: James Randi Hetfield
Home Address: 21 Hammett Dr
Hilton Head, SC, USA 29938

Business Address: MicroFlute Ind. Attn: James Hetfield
713 CliffBurton Circle
Hilton Head, SC, USA 29938

Tel/Fax: (206) 350-0XXX

Age: 42

Please find my picture and a copy of my ID attached as well, and do not hesitate to send or fax whatever documents will be neccesary to secure this money for you. My attorney, Mr. Erik Shun, has made me aware of a number of very good investments you may be interested in once we get your money back, Princess.

Your Brother in Christ,.

James

[Soulend]

Thanks Mr. Nicolaysen, I always loved all the Garage Days ones..even more so the $5.98 EP.

So, her "barrister" contacts me, equally devout and ridiculous.
NELSON KAZOR & ASSOCIATES
(Solicitor & Notaries Public)
3,Allen Avenue, Ikeja Lagos,Nigeria
Tel: 234 775 7301

From the desk of Barrister Nelson Kazor (LLB,Hons.Bsc)

Attn: Mr James Randi Hetfield

I am barrister Nelson Kazor an indigen of Cape Town South Africa. I am 56yrs old married with two kids and three grand children.I am oriented from a christian family. I work as a Legal practitioner here in Lagos Nigeria. I am a norminated attorney to the family of late Chief Micheal Ajana of no.1 commercial road Apapa Lagos Nigeria. I have been notified already by my client Miss Princess the first daughter of the late Chief after a meeting with this family to use my office and procure an agreement that will bind my clients family and you, Mr James of USA. I have made all the enquiry as a lawyer over the whole issue and also over the existance/origin of the fund because i cannot get myself involved in any illegal activity to avoid dent to my image and reputation in the society. Actually, i do not know you and as a practitioner, i have to act according to the constitution and law code: z3381 Vol.2 of 1994 constitution that is abiding this country Nigeria. I have made up my mind as a christian to help this children since their late father is a very nice man in this society from my findings.

However, I have been incontact with the given security firm in Senegal where this fund was deposited and from my findings, they required a lot of documents which was issued on the 15th Oct.2001 on the day of desposit. I have also discussed this with Miss Princess and she agreed to present those documents originally. They also made it clear to me that the payment must be in their sub-branch office in Europe due to the magnitude of the ammount involved. So Mr James , i want us to work as a partner and also as christains to this effect because according to Princess she has every trust on you as a fellow Christian, so i want us to be faithful and sincere to each other.
Futhermore, I have received your sent identity and contact address from Princess and i have succeeded in procuring the agreement which will bind both you and the Ajana family till the successful end of this transaction.I have taken it to the Princess family and they have signed their part, i have scaned and attach to you so that you sign your part and send back a copy to me and as well to Ajana family for a proper documentation.
Sir, the mother of Princess has requested that this transaction should be treated as a matter of urgency as this family is going through financial crisis as they hardly
feed right now. This is one of the major reason why they needed this funds to
be cleared out of the security firm to your account in USA for an investment. Also from my understanding as regards Mrs Ajana´s instruction, they really need to move out from this country for final settling in USA due to the act of their uncle.
They requested that you send some money to them immediately after the transfer of this fund to USA to enable them make an arrangement for visiting your country for disbursement of the total entitlement. My plans is to contact the diplomat attached with this security firm for immediate proceedings though that will be immediately after swearing an affidavit of claim and changing the name in ownership to your name as the chosen beneficiary of the deposited consignement. I will be keeping you updated as
regards every process in concluding this transaction.
I have also attarched a copy of my own international passport so that you know who is working with you.

Thanks for your understanding

Barrister Nelson Kazor

The Contract (note font change after first letter in text) (http://www.geocities.com/warriorcreed/contract.jpg)

And HIS "PASSPORT"! (http://www.geocities.com/warriorcreed/KAZORpassport.jpg )

This last is what's really funny, not only for it's obvious fakeness, but especially as I have a South African passport as well..argggghhh...I can't resist!

Whassup Nelson, how's it hangin'?

I have reviewed the contract you enclosed and found it to be all in order. I have signed it and attached the document to this e-mail. I will do whatever neccesary to ensure the return of Miss Princess's money, help in her family's relocation, and assist with investments. I currently am making phat bank in underwriting the production of meat whistles in Korea, and also mad loot with my Tube Steak investments in Argentina. Miss Princess may be interested in these investments when we get to that stage.

Thank you also for including your passport. I am South African as well, having been born in Jo'burg. Wow, the passports sure have changed! When did they start putting whack French on there instead of Afrikaans? And what's up with that funky rainbow island as a background design? It used to be the mad pimpin' Suid Afrika seal. Oh well, I haven't been there since 1979, so I guess things have changed.

Please keep me advised of any further requirements or developments in this matter, my Brother-in-Christ. I look forward to all parties reaping generously and with...Blessings.*

James Hetfield

* - listen to http://download.ammodumpradio.com/download.php?file=ammodump.tiltonfart1.rm for clarification of this reference.



CEO MicroFlute Industries
Hilton Head, S.C.

[Soulend]

Just a note..no racial or religious bashing is implied or intended by my responses to these idiots.

[Cady Goldfield]

Ah David, why did you go and write that to him? For sure you've scared him off. Gad, this is killin' me. :laugh:

[Soulend]

I dunno Cady..this one seems desperate enough to play with a lil bit...pretty sure I'll get a reply. If he starts balking, I'll start mentioning the crazy-fly laptop I plan to give Her Highness or maybe have Miss Spungen, my assistant, fire off one of these to their favorite charity..

[Cady Goldfield]

BWAhahahahaha :laugh:

In the meantime, this came in my work e-mail this morning:

----------------------------------------------

Princess Femi
Ajasa Street,
Badagry,
Cotonou,
Republic of Benin.
femifalana4@yahoo.com

Good day and compliment,

A CRY FOR HELP

I am writing this letter in confidence believing that if it is the wish Of God for you to help me and my family, God almighty will bless and Reward you abundantly. I got Your contact through Internet during my research on some one who could Help us,, and felt that you will be touched in our sober heart, hence this letter. I am a student. I am 22 yrs old. My father died two months ago and left my Mother I and my brother behind.

He Was a king, which our town citizens titled him before his death I was a Princess to him and I and my brother are the only people who Can take Care of his wealth now because my mother is not literate enough To know all my father's wealth. He left up to USD$15,500,000.00m with a finance Company, and I do not know how and what I will do to invest this money some where overseas, so that my father's kindred will not take over what belongs to my father and our family, which they were planning to do Without my consent, and presence because I am a female as stated by our culture in the Town.

That is why I felt happy when I saw your contact which I strongly believe that you will help me secure and invest this money. I hereby need your help in bringing the box Containing the money out from the finance company.

Based on your reply, I Will furnish you with more details on how we can proceed. I am ready to consider your offer of how much percentage share you can accept out of the total amount for helping us in securing this money and another 10% interest of Annual Income to you, for investing this money for us, which you will strongly have absolute Control Over. If you can handle this project sincerely and also willing to assist me In lifting this fund, kindly reach me and I
will let you know the next Step to take towards actualizing this transaction as quickly as Possible.

Please, note that this transaction is 100% risk free.
I look forward hearing from you soonest.

Yours sincerely,
Princess Femi
femifalana4@yahoo.com

________________________________________________________________
Get Tiscali Broadband From £15:99
http://www.tiscali.co.uk/products/broadbandhome/

----------------------------------------

Sound familiar? :D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Watch this: :D

http://www.zefrank.com/request

Very funny!

[Cady Goldfield]

I almost believed him...

That was effin' cool, especially they way he smoothly included all of the typos and grammatical errors of the written spam, without missing a beat.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

The whole site is really funny, especially the dating advice and the dancing...oh and also his kitty and animal noises (Giraffes go 'bloooob blobobobob'!)

http://www.zefrank.com

[Soulend]

BWAHAHA! That guy's great :D

Now the "Barrister" wants me to go to Madrid, I'll have to post it later when I have more time. Also loads of more bogus documents.

[Cody]

Just got this in the mail today

From: Madam Rebecca Mobutu
Old Presidential Retreat Villa
Democratic Republic Of Congo.

Sir,

My name is Rebecca Mobutu, one of the wives of late
president Mobutu of former Republic of Zaire, now know as
Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC).I was informed, some
months ago by a security/finance company in South Africa
that my late husband left a deposited consignment with
them, since the late nineties. I then sent my brother Moses
Kaddu to go there and check it out and he went and
confirmed that the consignment was there.

After that we searched my late husband?s files and found
some of the documents he used in depositing same
consignment with an attached letter, which showed that all
he deposited in the security/finance company was cash of
$25 million U.S.Dollars and some share certificates.

Since our findings, my brother Moses Kaddu has relocated to
Johannesburg, South Africa to see if he can arrange with
one of my late husband?s friends, who was a top banker in
South Africa, for the moving out of these funds out of
S.Africa.

My reason for contacting you is that we will like you to
assist my family in receiving this money for investment in
your country which you will equally manager and control, on
behalf of my family for a period of 5 years. These funds
will
be moved out of south Africa in your name or company?s
name,
you will be my family?s trustee/investment manager.

You will be allotted some percentage from these funds after
you
Receive them and the rest will be used for my family?s
investment
In your country.

If you agree to the above and will like to negotiate with
us, please forward your telephone numbers, fax and full
contact name, so that Moses Kaddu will call you for further
telephone discussions. You can also call Moses Kaddu on his
phone number +27-72-572-3881 .

Awaiting your response.

Best Regards
Madam Rebecca Mobutu.
Email: rbcm@mailbox.co.za

[Kaoru]

Gosh, I've been laughing through the whole thread! Unbelieveable! Geez, none of those scam people have any self-respect. What a shame! And, Soulend-san, you'd better be darned careful. You don't know who these people really are.

[Soulend]

I'm still at it with Mr. Kazor too. Had his 'holding comapany' reserve me a hotel in Madrid and arrange for picking me up at the airport this Sunday. Kazor himself will be there on Tuesday. I've even got them faxing me stuff to my k7 number. There's just been such a flurry of correspondence that it would have doubled the size of this thread already.

Posting my e-mail in website guestbooks with a small comment, like "nice site" has netted me so many 419 scammers that I have taken to posting the scammers e-mails on boards in lieu of mine.

BTW, he thinks that stashing the funds into one of my charities, the 'Matt Boxall Home for Underpriviledged Dwarves' is an excellent idea. :D

Kaoru, if they sent some sort of Nigerian hit squad to Hilton Head looking to bump off James Hetfield, that would just be icing on the cake.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend

BTW, he thinks that stashing the funds into one of my charities, the 'Matt Boxall Home for Underpriviledged Dwarves' is an excellent idea. :D


That's a great idea, I feel so sorry for those dwarfs...THEY'VE GOT NO TOYS OR ANYTHING!!!

hey! Why choose my name for it!?! :p

[Soulend]

Ah, just cause you posted in this thread, Matt. Thought you'd get a kick out of it.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
Ah, just cause you posted in this thread, Matt. Thought you'd get a kick out of it.

That's a good enough reason for me! ;)

I'd get more of a kick than a football in the last 10 seconds of a superbowl penalty! :D

Top banana!

Cheers

[Soulend]

"Dear Brother James,

Sir,

It is pertinent to inform you that i will not personally be able to come to meet with you in Madrid as scheduled, this is due to a vital national issue in my country that requires my undesirable presence.

I was recently appointed as secratary to a Judicial review committee on a recent labour law being enacted by the senate in my country. The inauguration of this committee will hold on Monday the 4th of Oct. As part of the country´s independence celebration, i am sorry for that and have explained this to the Princess.

But be not worried, i have designated one of my partners Barrister Romanus Chiagozie esq. A young and brilliant attorney in my chambers to come over and give you all the support and assistance. He is well knowledged in financial law and transaction like this.

He speaks quite some languages including Spanish which gives us better negociating power and advantage on your transaction in Spain. He has my confidence and you can trust and confide in him on anything, I mean anything.

He will be leaving Nigeria with an IBERIA flight tomorrow Sunday the 3rd of Oct in the morning to arrive Spain in the evening of same day.

Please as soon as you arrive and settled in the hotel, make haste to send me a mail providing the hotel telephone and your room number so that he can contact you. He will be calling me as soon as he is settled.

I wish you a hitch free transaction and always keep me updated by mail.
Best Regards

Barrister Nelson Kazor

Not that I think he's smart enough to look up an IP, but just in case I use an anonymous proxy in Philly to write:

Hello My Brother!

I am at an internet cafe is Philadelphia! There were some strong storms here today, and it is very cloudy, so I hope my flight to Madrid takes off on time. I am also very worried carrying so much cash that my bags will be lost.

I understand your e-mail. What a shame you will not be able to come yourself! If you can give me the flight details of Barrister Chiapet perhaps I can be at the airport to meet him. Well, another person is waiting to use this computer so I must go. I'll talk to you again after I get to Madrid.

Take Care,
James

[Soulend]

Attn: Brother James

It is good to read from you as i was worried waiting to hear from you as to enable me be sure that all process are still on progress. It is so unfortunate that i am unable to come Madrid myself due to the inauguration. Please accept my apology as we all are still going to meet in USA when the Princess family will be coming for an investment of their inheritance.
However, it is risky carrying such an amount in cash but do not be worried because God is with us and nobody can be against us. Actually, i do not know Barrister Romanus´s schedule though he called and notified me that he is about to board this morning. Surely, he will be in Spain this evening with you but try and call Mr Mark of the security company upon your arrival so that they will come and pick you up in the airport since they have arranged for your reservation. I wish you safe journey and keep writing me through email so that i will be updated as things go on.

Best Regards

Barrister Nelson Kazor

I can't resist at this point. I pick up the phone and dial the number to "Alpha Diplomatic Security" in Madrid. Someone answers. But not with "Hola!", and not with "Alpha Diplomatic Security, can I help you?", of course. Just "Hello" in a suspiciously African-sounding accent. Just wanted to see if it was even a real number. I can't find Plaza de Sur, the street on which ADS apparently resides, on any map of Madrid either...big surprise. So, I log into a Spanish proxy(Good God was it ever slow) and..

Dear Mr. Kazor,

I am now in Madrid, and it is beautiful and warm. As I mentioned before, I have a hearing problem, so I had my assistant attempt to contact Mr. Mark. The number shown on his fax seems to be wrong though...the number seems to be to a house or hotel room. Whoever answered the phone (and they answered by saying "Hello", not "Hola", or "Alpha Diplomatic Security") does not know a Mr. Mark. I imagine that they may have gone home for the day now. My driver tells me he knows of no plaza named "De Sur"...although there are a lot of other plazas here, and the people at the hotel tell me that there is no such place as Alpha Diplomatic Security...it's not even in the telephone book.

As we don't know your barrister's arrival time, I cannot pick him up at the airport. If he contacts you, please tell him that I am staying at the Carlos V hotel on Maestro Victoria, and to come over as soon as possible. Perhaps he can contact Mr. Mark as well.

Buenos Noches,
James

[MikeWilliams]

LOL @ "requires my undesirable presence"

This thread is great - Thanks David.

[Kaoru]

Originally posted by Soulend
I can't resist at this point. I pick up the phone and dial the number to "Alpha Diplomatic Security" in Madrid. Someone answers. But not with "Hola!", and not with "Alpha Diplomatic Security, can I help you?", of course. Just "Hello" in a suspiciously African-sounding accent. Just wanted to see if it was even a real number. I can't find Plaza de Sur, the street on which ADS apparently resides, on any map of Madrid either...big surprise. So, I log into a Spanish proxy(Good God was it ever slow) and..

Hey, I read the e-mail you sent him. hehe, Did you make sure to check the weather there before you wrote? That would be a very good idea. :D Also, "Plaza de Sur" is grammatically incorrect, and a street name wouldn't likely be written incorrectly. It should be Plaza del Sur. It's bogus. Oh, and it's "Buenas noches." :D


Kaoru, if they sent some sort of Nigerian hit squad to Hilton Head looking to bump off James Hetfield, that would just be icing on the cake.


Yeah I know, and that would be too funny! But, I meant just in case he actually got smarter and got your IP address and worked out who you really are. You do have a family, you know. Hackers can find out just about anything. You don't know who else he has working with him. It's a good thing you went and ussed another computer for the Madrid letter. But, he still has your IP address from the other e-mails. I'm just saying to be careful about what you do, just in case. Personally, I think you are just nuts and very daring! :D Me, I won't write just anybody. Too chicken!

I hope you get this guy good though... Scammers don't deserve much mercy. :D Keep us informed... This is too good! :D

[Soulend]

LOL Mike...I didn't even notice that.

I realize it would have been Del Sur, Carolyn-san. I searched for that name too. And I would have actually signed off 'Bones 'n' Notches' but I think it would be lost on him, as he's probably never seen Sanford and Son. I did check the weather too, for my e-mail from 'Philadelphia', and my one from 'Madrid'..so that part's accurate.
But, I meant just in case he actually got smarter and got your IP address and worked out who you really are. You do have a family, you know. Hackers can find out just about anything.
That would be pretty funny too, as I live on a military base, guarded and surrounded by hundreds of armed Marines. And with no bravado intended, my house is probably the last one a handful of mugus would want to assault. My family would probably shoot the idiots to death before I even got around to it.:(

And the fun continues...

Attn: Brother James

I received your email. I really missed this opportunity to visit Spain. I have just called Mr Mark of the security firm and have given him the name of the hotel where you are in Madrid to enable them locate you though you did not state to me the hotel and room number. He assured me that the company will this evening send a representative to come and pick you to a hotel where they have made our reservation. Please comply with them to enable us conclude this transaction without a hitch. I am still expecting to hear from Barrister Romanus, once i hear from him, i will let you know. I believe he must have be there by now as it is getting late here in Nigeria.
However, the hotel management might not be aware of the security firm as you stated because the head office is located in Senegal and this might be a new branch. Please keep me updated if you have meet with barrister Romanus as i am here getting worried and the Princess have also kept calling me for an update.

Good Luck

Barrister Nelson Kazor

So, time to go thru my old slow Spanish proxy and...

Hi Mr. Kazor,

It is after 11 p.m. here and I haven't seen any sign of anyone. The desk clerk says no one has come by asking for me. I am in room 206, by the way. It is a shame that the whole reservation business went a bit haphazardly and Mr. Mark didn't e-mail me back. We should have gotten all of this set up sooner.

Nevermind though, I trust that through our faith in God everything here will be concluded soon. Please let me know the status of Mr. Romanus. Since he is your representative, and I know I can trust you, I would feel much better if I was with him when I met with the security firm people, Brother Nelson. I so wish you could have come in person.

Well, as I say, it is late here and I am very tired from the trip still, I think I'll go out and relax for awhile and then go to bed. There is a club here called "Pacha" that everyone keeps telling me I need to go to. I may be having an Annointing with some female or another tonight so I hope the Alpha Security guys or Mr. Romancandle don't come too early tomorrow morning. Please tell Princess not to worry, everything will be fine I'm sure.

Your friend,
James

[Kaoru]

Originally posted by Soulend

I realize it would have been Del Sur, Carolyn-san. I searched for that name too. And I would have actually signed off 'Bones 'n' Notches' but I think it would be lost on him, as he's probably never seen Sanford and Son. I did check the weather too, for my e-mail from 'Philadelphia', and my one from 'Madrid'..so that part's accurate.


I never watched that show either, but it still is sure funny. What's it refer to? Hehe, Good that you checked the weather there. That's so funny he actually thinks you are in those cities! How did you use a Spanish Proxy? I didn't know that was even posssible.



That would be pretty funny too, as I live on a military base, guarded and surrounded by hundreds of armed Marines. And with no bravado intended, my house is probably the last one a handful of mugus would want to assault. My family would probably shoot the idiots to death before I even got around to it.:(

And the fun continues...



Oh man... You do? That WOULD be funny! I know how tough getting on Marine bases are... My Dad is a Marine. What's a "mugus?" Is that just a word for bad people?

Your latest e-mail was funny... I wonder if they will actually show up at your "room" door! Did you use a bogus hotel? I assume you did? :D I can't help but wonder how this will end up turning out! :D Do you think his "Barrister" went to Spain actually? :D

[Soulend]

:) .. Fred Sanford on the show (a bit like a black Archie Bunker) had a Puerto Rican neighbor, Julio. When Julio would say, "Buenas Noches, Mr. Sanford", Fred would go, "and Bones 'n' notches to you too".

How did you use a Spanish Proxy? I didn't know that was even posssible.
There are anonymous proxies all over the globe one can connect to and will hide your real IP. I always used to get a kick out of the script kiddies that would proclaim "I know your IP!" when I used to play games online. I would promptly respond 6 or 7 times, each time with a different IP in a different country with "Do you really?" written in that country's language. IP addresses are easy to spoof.
What's a "mugus?" Is that just a word for bad people?
A "mugu" or "mugu guymen" is a Nigerian scammer.
Did you use a bogus hotel? I assume you did?
Nope, it's a real hotel..I want him to actually knock on some poor soul's door and/or get tossed out by hotel security. The club I mentioned is a real place too...apparently the most happening discotheque in Madrid. I assume someone will show up at the hotel, as that's the only way they are going to get their money. :D

Hey Kaoru, why don't you stop by the sword forum at Budoseek.net sometime? :)

[Kaoru]

Originally posted by Soulend
:) .. Fred Sanford on the show (a bit like a black Archie Bunker) had a Puerto Rican neighbor, Julio. When Julio would say, "Buenas Noches, Mr. Sanford", Fred would go, "and Bones 'n' notches to you too".


Oh, I see! Fuuny! :D


There are anonymous proxies all over the globe one can connect to and will hide your real IP. I always used to get a kick out of the script kiddies that would proclaim "I know your IP!" when I used to play games online. I would promptly respond 6 or 7 times, each time with a different IP in a different country with "Do you really?" written in that country's language. IP addresses are easy to spoof.


Wow, I never knew that. Amazing! Hehe, I bet those kids where ue surprised! :D


A "mugu" or "mugu guymen" is a Nigerian scammer.


Oh! hahaha, I was off by a mile then. Thanks!


Nope, it's a real hotel..I want him to actually knock on some poor soul's door and/or get tossed out by hotel security. The club I mentioned is a real place too...apparently the most happening discotheque in Madrid. I assume someone will show up at the hotel, as that's the only way they are going to get their money. :D


Oh boy... That's just devious... :D If they do show up, boy are they in for a shock! :D Doesn't it make you wish you were a fly on the wall?


Hey Kaoru, why don't you stop by the sword forum at Budoseek.net sometime? :)

Yeah, ok. Thanks. :)

[Soulend]

Attn: Brother James

Honestly, i don´t know what is really going on over there. I am not too happy over the arrangement in Spain but i beleive God knows the best. Barrister Romanus called me late in the night and informed me that he have arrived Madrid, i gave him the name of the hotel where you are and this morning he called again and told me that he has been in the hotel and the receptionist told him that there is nobody answering that name when he mentioned your name. He gave them your room number and still you are not the one in that room, the hotel insisted. Please call barrister Romanus immediately so that both of you will meet. His number in spain is ( 34658612505 ).
Actually, this is just like childish a arrangement. Right now i am about to board for the inauguration meeting in Abuja. I don´t know how possible it will be for me when i get to Abuja to be controlling the transaction from there. Have you called Mr Mark again? It is very important that you call the company again or send an email to them and let them know exactly where to meet with you. I am worried over this because it will be a shameful thing that after all these process, including money and time spent so far and we cannot get the clearance done. This will authomatically be a great lose to me in person, you and the entire family of Princess. I will be glad if you let your driver call Barrister Romanus and Mr Mark immediately so that you all will meet for the clearance. I will be expecting your email.

Best Regards

Barrister Nelson Kazor

Uh oh, time to log into a different e-mail and bring my "attorney" into the mix and see what develops..

Dear Mr. Kazor,

Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Erik Shun, and I am
Mr. James Hetfield's attorney. I believe you have some business with
him in Spain, but he would not tell me the details.

He has asked me to contact you to inform you that he has been
detained by the Spanish authorities in Madrid. Apparently he had
over twenty thousand dollars in cash stored in the hotel safe, and
one of the employees looked inside and became suspicious. He and his
assistant are being held on suspicion of aiding the Basque
Separatist Movement, or possibly funding other terrorist
organizations. They are very interested in finding out what this
money was for, as it is highly unusual for a person to have that
much cash in $100 bills with him.

I know that these charges are ridiculous, although I too am confused
at the large sum of money. I am currently working with the American
Consulate to get him freed or at least deported without charges, and
the money returned. I cannot imagine what sort of business would
require all that money in cash, but I will keep you informed as to
what is going on because that was Mr. Hetfield's wish.

Erik Shun, Esq.
Attorney-at-Law
Loot, Plunder, and Shun Law Offices
Hilton Head, SC, 29938

[monkeyboy_ssj]

:laugh:

It gets better everytime!!!!

[Cady Goldfield]

Yeah. I check E-Budo every day for the next exciting installment. This is better than Reality Television. :D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Better than reality television!?! Do you realise the conitations of what you've just said Cady!?!

[MikeWilliams]

QUOTE: "This will authomatically be a great lose to me in person, and the entire family of Princess"

Oh I do hope so!

Classic!

[Cady Goldfield]

Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
Better than reality television!?! Do you realise the conitations of what you've just said Cady!?!

Um... that I have a keen grasp of the obvious, being that *anything* is better than "reality" television?

And do not suggest that Dave make a tv show of this. Heh heh. <i>"Scamming the Scammers," coming soon to CBS!</i>

Hey, on second thought...

[bgb]

The lawyer's letter is priceless! Wonderful!

Lately my scam letters have been personalized, ie someone filty rich in Africa with the last name "Bloom" has kicked off. No next of kin can be found. If none are found, the money goes to the government. I get 30% for coming forward as the long lost kin....

The deceased in this morning's e-mail was named "Bbloom" and everytime he was mentioned in the letter there was a space before the name, as it there orginally had been a longer name there....

Sloppy

Sloppy

Sloppy


Barb Bloom

[Cady Goldfield]

So, are you gonna fall for it, Barb? :D
You could have fun stringing him along like Dave.

[bgb]

Originally posted by Cady Goldfield
So, are you gonna fall for it, Barb? :D
You could have fun stringing him along like Dave.


:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


HEAVENS NO!


Minnesota nice and all that!


But if I get another I'll post it here so someone else can respond.....:eek:

Barb Bloom

[Kaoru]

hahahaha, That lawyer letter was just too funny! :D I can't wait to find out what he replies back with. :D

[Soulend]

Awww..still no reply. Let's see if I can make their 'Spanish Connection' sweat a little.

Dear Mr. Kazor,

We have succeeded in getting Mr. Hetfield released. The Spanish authorities were most interested in locating this "John Mark", and "Barrister Romanus" for questioning, and will be attempting to find them based on the telephone numbers you gave Mr. Hetfield as well as descriptions from the hotel staff. They also showed quite a bit of interest in this "Alpha Diplomatic Security" company.

Mr. Hetfield must leave the country as one of the terms of his release.

Erik Shun, Esq.
Attorney-at-Law
Loot, Plunder, and Shun Law Offices
Hilton Head, SC, 29938

[bgb]

Oh, dear.

A very excited Mr. Hetfield should e-mail them as soon as he gets back to the US.


And, today like clock work, my letter....

"Dear Bloom

To start with, I am Barrister Samuel Sanko, a solicitor and personal
attorney to one Mr Lenthi Bloom. Mr Lenthi was a chemical engineer and a contactor to some oil refineries in West Africa. Unfortnately, he and hisfamily of 3 met their untimely death in a ghastly motor accident in April 21, 1999 along Sagbama- Patani express way in Niger-Delta region

My client Mr. (Lenthi), before his death, has a deposit of USD9.5M with
a security company in Cotonou (Repubic of Benin) which was disguised as family treasure (i.e Gold Jewelries). My client was waiting for an opportunity to move the deposit abroad, but unfortunately his entire family was wiped out in the accident and lleft no clue to locate any of his relative.

After several attempts in search of his family member without
success, I have decided to trace his last name via the internet, hence I
contacted you with a view to co-operating with me to claim the money. The security company could declare it as abondoned assets and regard it as part of their profit if nobody comes forward for it.

Coincidentally, you and Lenthi shares the same surname, therefore, it will be easier to use you as the next of kin to make the claim. Already, I have some relevant documents to support the application for claim.

If you are comfortable with this deal, I suggest the sharing pattern as
thus:- 50% for me, 40% for you and 10% reserve for any unforseen expenses. The transaction need a high level of co-operation and honesty in order to make it a great success. I am prepared to obtain all the necessary court papers to make the arrangement a legitimate busness which would protect us from any breach of law and once this is done, it becomes risk free and indeed, a clean deal as well.

Please, get in touch with me immediately through any of these email
addresses:-mnsanko@yahoo.co.uk or sskkoo@fastermail.com
Awaiting your response soonest.

My regards,
Sam Sanko
_______________________________________________________
This e-mail was brought to you by eChina.com WebMail.
Please visit us at www.echina.com."

This one is much better written than most but, alas, only for 9.5 million.

Barb Bloom

[Soulend]

Well, guess it's time to twist the knife and move on to the next idiot.

{Addressed and CC'ed to all of the e-mail addresses he used}

Greetings of the day, me ol' Wanker!

Well, I guess the game is up. I hope you enjoyed it as much as my friends and I did. We all had a great laugh. Just wanted to bring a few things to your attention.

1) Do you realize how many of these 419 scammer e-mails the average person gets everyday? Well, you're about to, as I have taken the liberty of providing all your e-mail addresses to about two dozen of them. Perhaps you mugu guymen can do business with each other! Back to the question though..me neither, but I get about 20 a day. They are a joke worldwide...surely no one falls for such nonsense. If they are to be believed, there are hundreds of trillions of dollars just waiting to be claimed, and all originating from Nigeria. Rather odd for a country where the average person makes $1,220 per year and has an inflation rate of 50%, don't you think?

2) Strange that you and "Princess Ajana's" emails came from the exact same computer.

3) Also strange that the aforementioned computer is in BARCELONA, SPAIN, not Nigeria.

4) The documents you sent are the most awful forgeries I have ever seen, especially the "passport". The name "Nelson Kazor" doesn't even match any of the other text, and the picture was obviously just pasted from somewhere. I really am South African though, and I'll be damned if that's a South African passport. The rest of the so-called "official documents" are a joke..they were made up on a computer and even have numerous misspelled words.

5) What kind of major business, like your "Alpha Diplomatic Security", deals only in cash? Who in their right mind is going to travel halfway around the world with two hundred and thirty one $100 bills in their luggage? Isn't it funny that it is so easy to discover that no such company exists, even from thousands of miles away?

6) It should have been "Plaza DEL SUR" not "DE SUR" on your letterhead, idiot. You could at least learn the language since you live there.

To make a long story short, my name is not James Hetfield - he is the singer for the rock band Metallica. There is no "MicroFlute Industries". I am not a minister. I never went to Madrid. There is no laptop.

Why did I do this, playing you for a complete fool? Well, first because it's damn funny. But also to waste as much of your time, effort - and hopefully - money as possible. You see, it isn't nice to defraud people out of their hard earned money. What would you have tried to do if we met? Kill me? Rob me? Stupid maggot.

And on that note, I would like to let you know that I have contacted the police in both Barcelona and Madrid, as well as an investigative service by the name of Metodo3 in Spain. They have your IP's and all of the phone numbers you gave me, and are working with the internet provider you used - AUNA - to prosecute you for internet fraud. Perhaps through the strength of the Lord and the Spanish Internet Fraud Division you can be rehabilitated yet.

Happy to be of help, my brother,

"James"

*Metodo3 is a real investigative service, AUNA is the real ISP used. I won't be bothered to actually report him to the cops, but I'll give him a couple days to read the e-mail, sweat, get all these e-mail addies flooded with 419 e-mails; and then report him to AUNA...maybe at least get him kicked off his ISP.

Oh yeah..and I included a pic of a guy flipping him off. Next! :up:

[Cady Goldfield]

OhBoyOhBoy! The perfect finale! It's like the fireworks when you wait for that last big spew of rockets to top off a perfect show.

Dunno if I would have gone as far in explaining the Hetfield and Microflute stuff, but I doubt the scammer will read that far into the e-mail.

Still, a fine job, Dave.

Barb,
"Minnesota nice"? I've heard all about you Minnesotans and how polite you are -- I listen to <i>A Prairie Home Companion</i>! :D

[Kaoru]

Originally posted by Soulend
Well, guess it's time to twist the knife and move on to the next idiot.

{Addressed and CC'ed to all of the e-mail addresses he used}



*Metodo3 is a real investigative service, AUNA is the real ISP used. I won't be bothered to actually report him to the cops, but I'll give him a couple days to read the e-mail, sweat, get all these e-mail addies flooded with 419 e-mails; and then report him to AUNA...maybe at least get him kicked off his ISP.

Oh yeah..and I included a pic of a guy flipping him off. Next! :up: [/B]

Ahahahaha!! :D Oh boy, that was just hilarious!! Oh GOSH, that made me laugh! :D That was the most perfect way to finish him off, too. Not to be mean, but it sure serves him right! It would be a miracle if he ever learned his lesson!

Next, indeed! :D :laugh:

[gialiantpiddu]

:D :D
Thank You

:nw:

giuliano

[pgsmith]

Thanks for the entertainment Dave! It was great fun following this one.

Cheers,

[Cady Goldfield]

What will we do for our daily Abacha fix??? :(

[Soulend]

Shall I tackle Barb's guy? "James Bloom" has a nice ring to it, and I'm not from Minnesota...:D

[bgb]

Please do!

James Bloom is good.

If you really feel creative you could be JoAnne Bloom and yank his chain a bit.

Barb Bloom

[Cady Goldfield]

Do it! Let's see if you can string him along as far as the last one.

[Soulend]

OK..I need to change my voicemail and signature, etc. and I'll give him a whirl. He doesn't seem quite as desperate as the last one..but we'll see what happens. :)

Dang...new phony documents to make..lol.

[Soulend]

First volley...

Dear Mr. Sanko,

My name is JoAnne Bloom, and I am writing to let you know that I am most interested in helping to claim these funds. What an unfortunate thing to have happened to Mr. Lenthi and his family! Please let me know what I need to do.

I am especially interested as his name brings back such memories of my dear late husband, not only because his name was also "Bloom", of course, but also because I used to refer to him as "Mr. Lengthy". I anxiously await your instructions.

Blessed be,
JoAnne

[joe yang]

Years ago, Don Novello, aka Father Guido Sarducci, published a book, The Laslo Papers. It was a series of letters, written by Laslo Toth, to various product manufacturers, and the replies, it was rely funny. You may have another Laslo Papers on your hands.

[Soulend]

Ahh - I remember Father Guido! Ahh, the good ol days when SNL was still funny.

[Cady Goldfield]

Originally posted by joe yang
Years ago, Don Novello, aka Father Guido Sarducci, published a book, The Laslo Papers. It was a series of letters, written by Laslo Toth, to various product manufacturers, and the replies, it was rely funny. You may have another Laslo Papers on your hands.

Wow! I remember <i>The Laslo Papers</i>. <b>The best!</b> ;)

[sammycerv]

Originally posted by Soulend
I am especially interested as his name brings back such memories of my dear late husband, not only because his name was also "Bloom", of course, but also because I used to refer to him as "Mr. Lengthy".
[/B]

That is TOO funny!!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

[Joseph Svinth]

Oh my. Don Novello has three of these books.

http://www.lorain.lib.oh.us/localauthors/novello_don.html
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2003/09/18/DD25562.DTL

He says the third book is his last, however. From the latter site: The "letter- writing Lazlo Toth is going into retirement. 'I've quit. I have written now, over 30 years, to five U.S. presidents and seven presidents of McDonald's. I want to stop to write other things,' he says."

You may have a niche.

[Tripitaka of AA]

Thank you David. This thread has raised a cheer and some High-5s in this house. You are a Master.... thank you very much indeed. :D

[Soulend]

Thanks all :)

Attn A Bloom

Thanks a lot for your prompt response.

.For now, I would like to start the process of the legal papers in the name of JoAnne Bloom to make you the beneficiary which is the first step, this may take 4 to 5 working days. All the relevant documents involved shall be sent to you at the end of the process.

I also require your phone number for immediate contact whenever the need arises

Please confirm that this arrangement is accptable to you.

My Regards

Sam Sanko

Cool...looks like I get to waste 4 or 5 days of his already. Hopefully the documents look better than Nelson's, given all the time he has to make them.

Dearest Mr. Sanko,

This arrangement is most acceptable. My phone number is 206-350-XXXX. I shall eagerly await the documents.

JoAnne Bloom
CEO, Bloomin' Industries
Hilton Head, S.C

[Soulend]

Propane and propane accessories it is! :laugh:

[Cady Goldfield]

Hank Hill rules. :)
Propane... perfect.

[joe yang]

Or a meat by product, methane, ala "Beyond Thunderdome"!

[Joseph Svinth]

To Mr. Sanko, with a 206 area code (metro Seattle), you should be selling coffee products.

Decaff, of course.

[joe yang]

But first, kudos to Perfesser David Craik, you are the King. But I have to say thanks to Joe Svinth. More Laslo? I'm there, Mr. Bubble may be the most sublime correspondance in English literature. You can be a professor and a Perfesser. If you ever run across Brooks McNamara, tell him I said so.

[bgb]

David,

I can not beleive you got a nibble on that!

Too funny.

Barb Bloom
CFO, Bloomin' Industries

[Soulend]

Attn JoA Bloom

Thanks agin for your mail.

Today, I have started the process of the legal
papers to make you the beneficiary and as I earlier said,
this may take 4 to 5 working days which is the first step.

Kindly be checking your email box regularly in case of any important info that you should know. Secondly, whenever the Security Company contacts you, let me know so that I can advise you on how you would reply to them because they already have your email Address and phone number

keep in touch

My Regards

Sam Sanko

Hmmm..let's get to know each other while we wait.

My Dearest Mr. Spanko,

This sounds great. Do you know what the e-mail address of the security company is? I get a lot of business proposals in my e-mail and I don't want to accidentally delete it.

I suppose that while we wait for the documents to be finished I should tell you a bit about myself. I am the CEO of Bloomin' Industries, we specialize in propane and propane products..and we're pretty much the King of the Hill in this business. I also do a lot of charity work, particularly with the C. Goldfield Institute for Kosher Livestock®, a local organization, underwritten by the Rabbinate of Texas City. Are you involved with any charities, Sam?

Anyway, I have enclosed a picture of myself that my boyfriend James took while I was watching TV. Do you have any pictures of yourself you could send? It always makes business deals via e-mail so much more interesting when you can see what the other person looks like, don't you think?

-JoAnne

[gialiantpiddu]

hahahahaha... priceless

i'm afraid the pic might be pushing it a bit too hard... although it is hilarious....

cheers:D

[gialiantpiddu]

an italian tv show "striscia la notizia" just had the same idea as you (personally i found your way a lot more amusing).
anyway, as soon as the cameras came out, the "son of the former kenyan president" and his accomplice ran away.
too bad they didnt nearly have as much fantasy as you in picking their cover story.

cheers

[Soulend]

Hahaha...I would have loved to have seen it, Mr. Pezzoli. Of course, I'd be consulting my Italian dictionary a lot..:D

[Cady Goldfield]

Aaaaaahhh!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

I can't stand it!!! The photo is priceless. "While watching television." Bwahahahaha. And you got "James" into the act again. Not to mention sneaking my name in there, too. Now I'm an accomplice to a reverse-scam.

If your new "mark" keeps up this conversation after that photo, I'll be truly amazed. It would be the ultimate irony that a scammer could be gullible.

But, couldn't you have posted something with just a little less cleavage and wanton leg positioning? Our friend might think all American women are slutty, even CEOs. :p

[gialiantpiddu]

david, 2 things

1. mr pezzoli is my father, so please call me giuliano :D
2. if you're interested i can get the tape for the show and then put it online (infact as i am writing it is sounding cooler and cooler) so we can all enjoy.
dont worry about your italian, as the "son of the former kenyan president" speaks english to a translator, and is subtitled in italian. the rest of the show is probably around 5 minutes and i can post a brief translation.
:D :D :D

cheers

[Soulend]

That would be cool, Giuliano. Yeah, I think I went a bit over the top with that last one and scared him off. Just couldn't resist.:D

[Soulend]

Bwahaha..instead of scaring him off, I got an admirer! :laugh:

Dear JoAnne

Thank you very much for your sweet mail which of course I received with mix feelings. You are so beautiful that I went on looking at your Picture for more than 10 minutes. Momentarily, I forgot that we are only partners in business because I was actually having a kind of reaction of body chemistry. You see what I mean by mix feelings? Please, pardon me for being a little notty. I am sure your boy friend would have to guard you jealously after all, no man sees a good work of nature like you and shurt his heart except he is already disconncted. Even the blind has a way of noticing pretty creatures and that is very true.

Back to biz talk, I am indeed very impressed to hear to that you are involve in Charity work. All my life I've been praying to be a giver and a solution to the problems of the masses, but unfortunately, I haven't got the resources to do that. Perhaps, at the end of this transaction, I shall be in a postion to fulfill my dream.

In Africa, we are blessed with a bunch of self centred politicians who does not work for the growth of good Economy for the citizenry, instead, they would prefer to build reserve for their 10 generations unborn, it is a real bad way of life and the resultant effect is a situation where the rich live like Lords and can even compete with Bill Gate while the poor who are thrice in majority eats crumbs.

I pray I will one day associate with those who identify themselves with Charity work. By the special grace of God, I would love to be one.
The name of the Security Company is OAK RESOURCES LTD and I'm sure that their email address will reflect the name.

Here is my picture, it is about a year old. the recent ones with me were group photograph taken at parties and other ceremonies, I hope you wouldn't mind

Awaiting to hearing from you soonest, in the meantime, have a good day.

My Regards
Sam


He even sent me his pic! Handsome devil, no?

[Soulend]

My reply..

My dear Sam,

Thanks you so much for your very kind words and photo. You are very good looking - is there a Mrs. Sanko? If so, I'm sure she must be very happy to have such a nice man.

I have received an e-mail from Oak Resources, and they need:

1) A photo page copy of your Drivers License or International passport.

2) A Photograph of the late Mr. Lenthi Bloom for our record

3) A copy of Death Certificate of Mr. Lenthi Bloom.

4) Original copy of the Certificate of Deposit.

I have no problem sending a copy of my identification, but I will have to get the other documents from you Sam.

God Bless You,
JoAnne

Guess I best get cracking on some ID...

BTW, the previous e-mail's subject was "Good Looking you are". Apparently old Sam's a Yoda fan in addition to being a lady-killer. :D

[Cady Goldfield]

:laugh:
Well, now we know it's true that there's a sucker born every minute. And our new "business partner" seems to think so, too.

Good thing he didn't dig up his photo the same place you found yours. :D

[bgb]

:eek:

I am speechless.

Barb Bloom

[Soulend]

Barb, do you generally have as much fun being a Bloom as I am? I'm thinking of changing my name forthwith. This guy's great - I wish I had gotten him to start with.

Hi JoAnne

You are looking so nice that I couldn't resist glancing at your picture whenever I open my box, you are quite beautiful and that is that.

The Court papers will be ready this week by the special grace of God, therefore, tell the Security Company that your Lawyer will submit the documents to them in few days time. I will also send all of it to you for your record.

Meanwhile. here is the photograph of Mr Lenthi, you can send it to them along with your identification. I think from now I have to be reaching you everyday with progress report.

By the way, how does propane and propane Product look like?

Awaiting to hearing from you soonest.

My Warmest Regards
Sam

Man, wish I could come up with something funny for the propane question. Far out...Lenthi's a white dude!

[Tripitaka of AA]

Originally posted by Soulend


Man, wish I could come up with something funny for the propane question. Far out...Lenthi's a white dude!

How about some high altitude weather balloons... or maybe something from the NYC St Patrick's day parade. Or just a plain old mega-sized barbecue set with a side of beef on it... just to get his mouth watering for all that gluttony and greed that the great USA might bring within his grasp.

How about "recognising" Mr Lenthi!

[Cady Goldfield]

Whoa. In his previous post, he states that he stared at your photo for 10 minutes.
I wonder what he was doing during those 10 minutes, and why it took so long. :D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Cady Goldfield
Whoa. In his previous post, he states that he stared at your photo for 10 minutes.
I wonder what he was doing during those 10 minutes, and why it took so long. :D

You need to go wash that filthy mind of yours Cady... :p

[BC]

[i]
Man, wish I could come up with something funny for the propane question. Far out...Lenthi's a white dude! [/B]

How about for supplying propane burners/lighters to the crack pipe industry. You could say something like your biggest customers are a large, "syndicated family" business (the Mafia), and two other companies, the Crips Corporation and Bloods Incorporated.

[bgb]

Originally posted by Soulend
Barb, do you generally have as much fun being a Bloom as I am?

Ah...no.

But then I've never pretended to be a buxom blonde propane heiress, either. :p

Keep up the good work, David!

Barb Bloom

[Soulend]

LOL...I love that crack pipe idea. I'm going to have to use it. Well, I'm getting e-mails faster than I can post them now. The scam begins...

Dear JoAnne,

How are you today? Feeling fine I guess, if so, thanks be to God.

Look JoAnne, I have a little problem which I previously didn't want to bore you with, but this morning, I felt there is no harm in bringing the hitches to your notice, atfer all, it is said that problem shared is problem half solved, therefore I have no reason shying away from reality.

The court papers shall be ready between Thursday and Friday this week, but I'm yet to meet up fully with the understanding I earlier had with
the Court offcials as regard endorsing it to our favour.

The official payment for the processing and greasing the palms of the
Court officers in-charge was expected to cost me $4,900, I have already
spent $3,700, although I spoke to few friends for loan, but they have
not responded as at this moment. I am therefore, appealing to you to
assist me with any amount you can afford, I do not just want the Court
officials to start nursing the idea of breach of mutual trust on my
part.

If your heart is willing to assist, kindly send it through Western
Union Money Transfer, so that I could receive it before Friday morning.
My full name once again is SAMUEL SANKO and the destination is Lagos, Nigeria (West Africa). However, if you are not willing, don't bother,
no hard feelings whatsoever.

Hopefully, we will be one on one very soon because I can't get my eyes
off your Picture. Have replied to the Security Company according to my
advise?

Respond Urgently

My Redards

Sam

So, I figure I can pretend to send him some money, along with a scan of my trusty fake Western Union transfer.

Hi Sam,

Yes, I have sent the picture and my ID to the security company and they wrote back saying they received it, and are waiting for the other documents.

As to the problem, I can only wire $1000 at this time. Will that be sufficient to proceed? If so, I can have my assistant, Ms. Spungen, send it to Lagos tomorrow sometime.

Best Retards,

JoAnne

Dear JoAnne

I can't thank enough for your understanding, it appears you combined beauty and kindness which makes you a special woman. We may have to discuss other issue outside business when we meet in a shot distance time if you don't mind.

I need total of $1,200, but I will make an effort to get the remaining 200 to make it up before noon tomorrow. Once again, thank you very much.

These are the information I would require to enable me cash the money.

1) Western Union Control number

2) Sender's name in full

3) The Town and State where it was sent

For security purposes, you can add test question as (HOW OLD ARE YOU) and the answer shall be (42 YEARS.)

Please, my dear, do your best to ensure secrecy, it wouldn't give us a good image if you allow people to know the reason behind the transaction.

Don't forget that if you tell just one person and that person tell another one or two persons, before you know it, the news will be everywhere, therefore there is need for you to maintain absolute confidentiality in this subject.

I look forward to seeing your message early enough tomorrow, Thursday.

My Regards

Sam

Check out that second and third line! :laugh: Unfortunately for me, things got pretty busy at work(real life) and I'm not going to be able to doctor the thing up in time (too tired to fool with it now), so..

Dear Sam,

I am so sorry, I may have jumped the gun a little bit. I just got out of a meeting and my assistant has the day off tomorrow and I have to go up to Myrtle Beach to meet a client. I will wire the money via Western Union Friday at the latest. I apologize for not being able to wire it tomorrow, but I will do it.

Never worry about confidentiality, Sam. My assistant is absolutely trustworthy and handles details of many sensitive transactions for me.

Once again, my apologies for not being able to get it out tomorrow darling. I so look forward to meeting you in person someday soon.

Take Care,
Jo

Think I may have to break up with 'James' to see if this encourages him some, too..

[bgb]

I agree with him, David.




You make a very...special...woman.


Barb Bloom :)

[pgsmith]

Hey David,
How about if you string him along for a while, and then start telling him how the operation to make you a complete woman is only a few weeks away!

Just a thought! :)

[Soulend]

ROTFLMAO...I'm going to use that one Paul! I'll wait until it starts going downhill after he raises hell with the Western Union office for not having his money! :laugh:

Here's my latest:

Compliments of the day, my dear Sam,

Well, I'm back in town and I hope this e-mail finds you in good spirits. I wish I was doing better. James and I had a bit of a fight and I think it may be over between us (James and I). I wish he were nice like you, Sam. Once I have this money I'm sure he will be sorry though, eh? Perhaps we could take a holiday together - that would be sure to make him jealous!:D

But, back to business. I will have Ms. Spungen wire you $1000 tomorrow morning. I wish it could be more - I know how expensive it is to grease up people sometimes. As soon as she comes back to the office I will have the Western Union tracking number for you.

In the meantime, you asked before about our propane and propane products. Propane is, of course, a natural gas found in petroleum and used in a number of appliances, heating systems, and crackpipe lighters. We supply both the gas and the products mentioned above. I'm sure you have these things in Nigeria as well, though you may be using dung fires or something. My client that I was meeting today was from Crips Unlimited, a major supplier of crack and crackpipes, and because of the need for propane the meeting went very well. I have included a pic of one of our grills...excellent for cooking up nice, juicy steaks - and another picture of me, since you seemed to like the last one! It was taken with my friend Natalie in Florida last year. Do you have any other pictures of yourself?

Anyway, I am so happy that the deal looks good on your end Sam. I'll be talking with you again tomorrow.

Love,
Jo

Pics:

http://images.iventa.com/pamela/pamnatalie.jpg

[Cady Goldfield]

Wow! JoAnne has such HUGE... tanks of propane!

[GreySilk]

One of the main reasons i come back to ebudo..night after night..


thanks for the entertainment mate.


(Being a tech bored at work, this helps pass the hours.)

[Soulend]

How sweet! He sent me pictures of roses! Pink ones, white ones, red ones...as well as two voice messages I can hardly make out. I like being a woman! Er..hope my Sergeant Major doesn't read this....
http://www.ze-card.com/images/roses/roses44.jpg
http://www.ze-card.com/images/roses/roses10.jpg
http://www.ze-card.com/images/roses/roses37.jpg
http://www.ze-card.com/images/roses/roses38.jpg

Dearest Anne

Excellent good morning to you over there.

You are full of surprises, but first, can you give me one good reason why you should break up with James? Did he has access to my mails? Does he
suspect we are dating? Was he so jealous when you meet with opposite sex? Do you refuse him access to see you whenever he wanted? Did you keep late outside against his will? Are you domineering? If the reason is found among the above suggestive possibilities, I will candidly ask
you to go back and reconcile with him because any man who has a beautiful lady like you can equally do asmush. You should understand that most men are usually not at ease when they have good looking woman as a wife or friendship and I too is not an exclusion.

Anne, I have a defficiency of looking foolish when it comes to a good work of nature's art which you are one. I will become an appendage and a paste in your life, I'm sure you certainly wouldn't like one man to be all over you all the time. Such is the brief habit of Mr Sanko.

Please, put effort to mend fences with James first, it is important because if I'm given the opportunity to take over my heart desire, nobody takes over from me, think about that.

Sorry my dear, right now I have only group pictures with me, I think going to the studio for a snap is not a bad idea, but I'm also considering it not worthwhile going into a temporary relationship or rather just to make another man hang himself for envy. I don't desire to taste, I desire for keep, take note of that.

Tanks for making time out to explain the activities of your Organization, maybe, I could be one of the shareholders if I'm able to meet up your conditions.

I shall be expecting your mail later in the day

Yours Sam

So, I wrote him back giving him the bogus tracking number off of the equally bogus Western Union receipt which I will e-mail him with exclamations of astonishment when he returns from the WU office perplexed and empty-handed as all hell. :D

Love the monster grill! I'll try and work it in somewhere..

[Tripitaka of AA]

He is such a smoothy... he's nearly won my heart already (if I could just overcome this bout of unexplained nausea).

[Cady Goldfield]

But, would you shave your legs (and back) for him?
:D

[Soulend]

Originally posted by Cady Goldfield
But, would you shave your legs (and back) for him?


The latter's a non-issue...but lemme get back to you on the former, Cady. :laugh:

No new ones today..maybe the internet cafe is closed on Sunday. The voice messages are always a riot because of the raucous background noise which always accompanies them...like he's phoning from a cattle auction or a Lynyrd Skynrd concert.:D

[Soulend]

Knew I wouldn't have to wait long. Another voice message (which I can at least partially understand):
http://www.geocities.com/warriorcreed/206350080810170807412069731019.WAV

And another e-mail:

Honey.

It is nice to know that you are fine, I was afraid your differences with James has assumed another dimention, but thank God there was nothing like that.

Darling, I do not kmow whether your assistant nse her name, but I need the name of the sender, the Town where it was sent and the State, othterwise, I wouldn't be able to cash it. You can as well send the Western Union receipt. I will obtain the documents tomorrow if you can furnish me with these 3 items urgently.

Have you reconciled with James? What is the situation right now?

Please,get back to ne soonest.

Yours Truly

Sam

This dude uses more terms of endearment on me than my wife, and this is a great opportunity to send him pics of the gigantic grill too!

Hi Sam,

I have reconciled with James, and little does he know he has you to thank for that. It was nothing about you though, sweetheart, he doesn't know of you or of our business arrangement, to keep it confidential as possible. Everything is all fine now. I still look forward to meeting you one day.

I have attached the receipt from the Western Union office. All the information you need should be on there.This weekend my company also had an exibition and showed off a propane grill that we had made..I included a couple of pictures of it too - you may find them funny.

Look forward to receiving these documents, darling.

Sincerely yours,
Jo

[Joseph Svinth]

Don't worry about the Sergeant Major. He's probably too young to appreciate the Old Corps. ("You say that I am ignoring the time-honored traditions of the Royal Navy? And what might they be? I shall tell you in three words: rum, buggery and the lash! Good morning, sirs!")

FWIW, Churchill's post-WWII assistant, Anthony Montague-Browne, has said that the First Sea Lord never said that, but that he wished he had. http://www.winstonchurchill.org/i4a/pages/index.cfm?pageid=112

[bgb]

David,

So, did Sam ever get his money from Western Union?

Barb Bloom

[Soulend]

Hehe..I've been remiss on the updates - the e-mails, fake documents, and unintelligible voice messages have come fast and furious. Here's the ones I bothered to reply to:

Dear Sweet Heart

How are you!

It is nice to hear that you have reconciled with James that is very kind of you.

Thanks for the brochures of your product, but who is that fat man in one of the pictures? Is that James? Whoever he is need to trim down and get himself free of chollesterol.

Honey, surprisingly, I got to Western Union and I was
told there was no money in this tracking 7325963612,
what happened?

Respond ungently

Truly yours
Sam

I should have told him it was James, just to tick him off, but..

My darling Sam,

Thank you for your dear message and e-mail. Heehee..that fat man is one of our salesmen. You're right, he should trim down.

Sam, I don't know what has happened with the money wire. Do they have a time limit for cashing it or something? I'm pretty upset, as $1000 is a large sum for them to simply misplace. I'm going down to the Western Union myself tomorrow and find out what's going on!

I should just take some time off and fly to Lagos personally...

Love,
Jo

Then he sends me some bogus documents, and a couple of them actually look pretty good! Seals, stamps, notes scrawled in the margin by some bored clerk...except it's the exact same scrawlings in the exact same location in the exact same hand on each document. :D
And some more voice messages where I can make out "Jo", "Sam Sanko", and "Good day". I also got one that said he has to come up with the money by this Friday or else the judge can order the documents voided. I'm definately on ol' boy's mind, though, as I got three e-mails within 15 minutes of each other today. The last of which:

Honey,

Do you ever use your phone? It seems to be perpetually on answering device.

Truly Yours
Sam

Ahh...wondered when he'd find out about the results of my unfortunate smelting accident...

Dear Sam,

I have a hearing problem which prevents me from using a regular telephone, due to the fact that I have problems understanding electronically carried speech because of the frequency. I can use a textphone however, if you have access to one I can send you this number. Otherwise my answering system translates speech on my answering machine into text for me. Let me tell you it has a little bit of trouble with your accent!

Thank you for the documents, Sam, however I am very confused about the money transfer. I went to the WU office today with my assistant and they stated the the money was picked up by a person who identified himself as Samuel Sanko and had an international passport with that name. It was picked up on the 17th at 2:37 PM at the Co-operative Development Bank, 3B Ligali Ayorinde St., Victoria Island in Lagos. I'm sure you can understand my confusion! If you did not pick it up, could it perhaps be some dishonorable court official that you have been dealing with that might know of our arrangement? I had my assistant call them but she could not understand the person on the other end. Since it is a bank, surely they have a security camera and caught the person on tape...unless the bank officials are corrupt as well, of course. Please let me know if you can find out anything.

Love you,
Jo

The bank is real, they have a Western Union Desk, the address is real, and they close at 3 PM on Sunday - checked 'em out just to make sure they weren't closed. It's unfortunate that he didn't take my bait about travelling to Lagos, though. Granted, I haven't been coming up with a lot of funny stuff lately, because I'm going to try a different tack depending on what he says next. Think I'm going to try to get some money (20 bucks or so) out of him as a show of good faith before I "wire" him any more money. Hey, it's been done before...and I can donate it to the charity of your choice, Barb. :)

[bgb]

"Darling"

"Sweet heart"

"Love you"


My. You two have gotten close!

I would love to see you get $20 out of Mr. Sanko. Any childrens' charity would be fine.

I really think you should mention to him that you appreciated the attention to detail in his forgeries. When the time comes of course. Or maybe, if the time comes. It might be fun to get into a spat with him over some advise he gives you and ignore him. I'll bet he tries to make up for quite some time.

Barb Bloom (although the "Bloom" at this point seems redundant)

[monkeyboy_ssj]

You never know...

Maybe love will blossom yet :D

[BC]

Was it a smelting accident, or a felching session gone wrong? :p

[Soulend]

Oh this is great! Get this:

Darling

Thanks for your detailed mail and I'm sorry to hear of your hearing problem, but never mind, it has just a minor effect, maybe when I come over, we shall try out some medical centres.

I have been to Bank this morning and there were some obvious irregularities of how the money was cashed. The Bank Manager suspected a connivance of a staff because the identity of the receiver was distorted. Spot picture taken showed only half a face and from the photocopy of the identification paper, the alteration was also noticed. The Police has already picked up the bank staffer, but I shall submit official complain to the police tomorrow for full investigation. <---- (editor's note)BWAAAHAHAHA!!

17th October was Sunday and that was the same day you sent the particulars to me and I saw it in the evening, therefore, the leakage was already from the office where it was sent. It is the hand work of hackers, it has nothing to do with the court officials, they practically knew nothing about it. Anyway, I was advised to always use my passport number as answer code and that is the only way to secure it.

Honey, if we start waiting for the investigation, it will take sometime, therefore, I'm appealing to you to temper justice with mercy and send the money so that we will not run into trouble with the court.

Now the test question shall be:- WHAT IS YOUR PASSPORT NUMBER and the answer shall be:- ECOWAS PP NUMBER 232/113083.

Have you not heard from the Security Company yet?

Darling, kindly do something immediately so that the court would not think we are playing on their intelligent. We have till Friday morning to comply

Respond urgently.

Yours sweet heart.

Sam


Also he sent another e-mail with like 16 pictures of roses entitled 'This is for You From My Heart' and two voice messages, one which is silence and the other which is basically gibberish. At least I'm running up his phone bill! I'll be composing a reply a bit later...

[Soulend]

Honey,

Once again, thank you for your understanding. Meanwhile the Police investigation revealed that the perpetrators used a photocopy of an International Passport, clean off the name on it, fix my name and produced another photocopy from it which was left in the Bank as evidence that the owner indeed collected the Money. The Bank staff admitted that he convinced his Boss that he has sighted the original PP because the guy involved was his friend. The guy who cashed it is on the run, but the Police said they are ready to go to his Village (800km away from Lagos) if I am prepared to foot the bill.

This is one of the problems in this part of the World, you can not gain access to justice except you have the money. Police Department were never given sufficient money by the Federal Government, therefore, they can not effectivelty perform their primary duty except the complaint is ready to foot whatever expenses that might be involved. The judicial system was not different and that is largely why almost every Government worker is corrupt in this Country of ours. If you happen to have a legal matter here, it is the highest bidder that would certainly come out victorious. A situation where Government workers could not receive their salary for 3-4 months, what do you expect? Corruption takes over the driver's seat.

To compound my problem, the Bank does not buy the idea of making refund, instead, they advocate that the Police should charge the case to court and let the staff go to jail to pay for his sin. However, the Police is not in a hurry to do that , they insisted of getting into the root of the fraud because they are interested to know how the pricinpal actor got the the tracking code to start with. This is the situation at the moment.

Regarding the transaction, I came back from the Home of the Court Registrar about an hour age, the summary of our discussion was that, he is not alone and he would find it extremely difficult to convince his colleagues because they usually suspect each other when it comes to a matter of money and of course, I cannot walk to the Judge to discuss with him, the Judge himself wouldn't like it because he want to protect his office and image.

Finally, it will be my greatest happiness if you can have a change of heart and do something to guaranttee our free position as far as the Court issue is concerned, but if not, we shall depend on luck

May the Lord Almighty be with you now and always. I am also praying to God to save me from any further embarrassment especially of this nature.

Kindly respond urgently

Yours Sincerely
Sam

Well, here goes...anyone know how much a P.O. Box costs? :D
My Darling Sam,

How terrible that conditions are so corrupt in Nigeria, and that one cannot even get the law to help unless one pays them off. God willing, when this deal is all over you will be able to move somewhere where the police are properly funded to protect the citizens.

Sweetheart, please do not take this the wrong way, but rather please look inside your heart to understand my feelings. I have lost $1056.08 because of some crooks, and am worried about sending additional money of the amount we are talking about without a token of trust. Although I am fairly wealthy, a thousand dollars is rather a large sum to have stolen. Would you be willing to mail a small amount of money to me, say $20, as a sign that there is a mutual trust between us? As you have found, I have shown my trust in you by wiring a considerable amount of money...all that I ask, my darling, is that you show me the same, but with much less money. This is less than it will cost to wire you the $1350 dollars you now require, and I will be happy to give it back.

I hope that you do not consider this request rude. But if you are willing, then I suggest that I send the money via mail by International Postal Money Order rather than wire it, because of crooked bank officials there. Please let me know what you think. We both stand to gain far more money than the amounts so far.

Love You,
Jo

[sammycerv]

Doesn't he know that the woman is Pam Anderson? I though Baywatch was the biggest show in the world!

[Cady Goldfield]

:laugh:
The photos are worth at least 20 bucks from a soft porn site. Hope he falls for it.

[Mekugi]

Dammit I wish I would have found this thread earlier.

Tell them this

"A money order costs me additional money to deliver ($50). Seeing that this is *your* money for the time being, I think you should pay for the money order bill to be fair and as a sign of good faith. As soon as I recieve the money to pay for the money order, I will send it immediatly."


THERE YA GO! That's a fact, it costs money to send money. If they want their piece of the pie and feel that they would be showing "good faith" they should pay for the money order...which I would spend on beer.

-R

[Soulend]

Dang, he's not going for it. Another voice message and the email below:

Honey,

Thanks a lot for your mail and frankly, I wouldn't consider anything you say in this issue as rude, rather you are a vrey good person and kind hearted. What ever happens, I will continue to pray for you because I base my trust in God.

In my life, I do not like to back up any argument by swearing becaues it does not bring instant Judgement, therefore whether one is saying the truth or not, swearing would not attest to the truth. I believe that my conscience will always be my greatest Judge. My conscience makes me to be proud of myself when I do sometime right and it equally condemns me if reverse is the case.

For the moment, I am desparately searching and thinking of how to gather 1350, it is easy for somebody to say hi! give me just $20 and I will give you what you want. In my owe case, I think differently, if you don't trust me, sending even $500 would not make any difference. If I send any money to you with intent to receive several folds the amount, will amount to gambling. If I am in a position to send something to you, I will do it from my heart to you for whom you are. I like to be who I am, I can not buy your trust, but rather work to earn it. I f wishes were what I could enforced by physical power, I would have put up my best to ensure that you see the truth of this matter with your naked eyes. Nevertheless, time shall tell.


Meanwhile, the Judge shall start his annual vacation on friday and I have appealed to them to give me till Wednesday because I do not want to be taken by surprise. It is a question of one line sentence and the whole work I did will come to a standstill, so by the special grace of God, I want to avoid any further bad news.

Today, I took my car to money lender, he said it is an old model and he can only offer me $700 for it. If there is no other option, I will give it to him on Tuesday, but then, I still require 650 to make it up. Sweetheart, in the name of God, soften your heart and assist me to make it up. I have put my life savings into it and it will be a calamity if it hangs half way. Once again, for God sake, help me.

Yours sincerely
Sam

Oh well. Perhaps I can string him along a bit more and make him wait at the airport...

Dearest Sam,

Thank you for your mail. I'm sorry that my proposal is not good for you. Perhaps trust is only a one way street in your country. It is easy for someone to say "hi give me $20"? I've already lost over $1000! You say that sending money in the hopes of receiving several fold the amount is gambling, yet is this not exactly what I am doing?

How about the option of me flying there and bringing the money in personally? I'm sure you can understand that I don't trust sending by Western Union and we do not have the time to wait for the mail. In this case, I hope that you can persuade the judge to give us until Wednesday.

Please reply soonest.

Sincerely,
Jo

[bgb]

David,

You are doing such a good job! You really to need to share this with a wider group. Perhaps you could edit things a bit and submitting it to the letter achives at 419eaters or some similar site.

After all, how often does the scammer tell you he's gone to the police....

Barb Bloom

[Cady Goldfield]

Maybe create a blog and go global. Sort of a "ghostbuster" site, except it's about scamming scammers. :D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

I think you could make a great cult site out of this stuff...seriously.

[Soulend]

Honey,

Thanks for everything and I'm very sorry for all the trouble I might have caused in this regard.

Darling, put business aside, meeting you in person will be the greatest thing that will ever happen in my life. You are good looking, you are kind, you are Godly, you possess the general attitude of a woman with different. You are composed, calm and intelligent, yet you are not boastful like other ladies who are far below your standard. Don't forget I did not start saying it today, but from the beginnig of our association.

I will be delighted to have you as my guest even for one week, thereafter, if I die, I should be dying smiling having met you one on one in my life time. It has always been my prayer for God to set a day aside to meet with this great lady and not in the dream anymore I need the opportunity to look at your face and say my mind which has nothing to do with business transaction. May the Almighty Lord have mercy and grant my prayers.

Regarding the other issue, yes, they have given me till Wednesday to fufil my own part of the agreement and I am doing everything humanly possible to ensure I wouldn't be found wanting and I believe that with God, nothing is imposible.

Now back to your visit preposition, do you require a letter of invitation? Or what do you think I can do to enhance your smooth entery visa, though I wouldn't be surprise to hear that you have a diplomatic Passport, I think you deserve one judging by the meassure of how you have humbled yourself

Honey, you misunderstood my recent mail, but it doesn't matter, I will express myself better when we meet, hopefully, this will be actualized in a short while. I do not want the issue of money to become a barrier between us, I have a passion for you which is not money induced. What happened to the one thouand was unfortunate and high regretted.

Please, don't miss writing me everyday, I miss you a lot and I wish we could speak on phone, but I can't wait to run my hands through your shoulders, your back and grap your brea.., sorry, I looked at picture and got lost again, forgive me , I am wet, let me stop here.

You remain always in my mind
Sam

LOL! So I sent back a one liner saying 'What a naughty e-mail.", and I get a most apologetic (what I can make out of it)voice message (http://www.geocities.com/warriorcreed/20635008081026113208.WAV), and the following:

Honey Pie

Look, I am very sorry, yes I admit it is naughty. I have a fault of not being able to hide my feelings especially when it comes to my heart desire. Although, it is too hard to shut you off my mind, but I think with determinatiion, I can do it or at least pretend to.

Once again, I am on my knees, forgive me and delete the offensive message from your email box . What about your propose visit? you didn't say anything or have you change your mind? Pleas don't be angry with me, I never intentionally want to do anything to hurt you, I merely speak out my mind and I am sincerely sorry for that.

If you have forgiven me, kindly write back immediately

Yours sincerely

Sam


I reply...

Hi Sam,

Don't worry about it...I thought it was rather sweet. I'm still willing to come, but since we only have until tomorrow...there is no way I could arrive in Lagos until tomorrow night even if I jumped on a flight right now.

Let me know what you want me to do, Sam.

Love,
Jo

[Cady Goldfield]

What do you suppose the chances are that "Sam" knows he's being counterscammed and is just playing along too? No one could be THAT forward and expect to be encouraged by a woman...

On the other hand, if he is greedy enough, he may figure he can Get Some along with the money.

Dave, you are a goddess. Er, a god. Er... :laugh:

[Exorcist_Fist]

Cady, you have never seen what passes for courting outside the US perhaps? Even in some of the less civilized areas of Europe, that is par for the course.

Hell, to be honest, I once got a girl in rural virginia with letters like that. ((Don't ask, I was young, dumb, and it was a long time ago. I still managed to have fun.))

[Exorcist_Fist]

Personally I think Sam can get the money easily, if he were to print out this thread and threaten to distribute copies to the personnel on David's base...

[Cady Goldfield]

Maybe it's time for the personnel at Dave's base to be introduced to his Feminine Side. :p

Yeah, I guess I haven't paid a lot of attention to male courtship behavior in cultures where women aren't either protected or kept "virgin pure" for later barter. And of course, no guy ever came on to me that way because they had a healthy respect for my ability to rip their head off. My fiance has always been reaaalllly polite. :D

[Kaoru]

You know I have been reading this each time you put up a new one Soulend-san and I never can think of a single thing to say. It is so darned FUNNY, but yet, this is what can happen when a girl is shameless and flirts like a fool. I don't think it is appropriate to flirt so. I mean, well, not to be so serious... I just am not sure what to make of all this! But, they sure are funny! Please don't think I am wierd guys! I never saw such, uh, fluff!

But you not being a girl, well, wait until this guy finds out. He'll learn a tough lesson about being so greedy! :D He's being just as bad. My jaw dropped at his last one. My! And, Cady-san has a point... What if he does know? :D

I think you are amazing to have pulled all this off far. And, it is terribly funny that he doesn't even know whose picture that is!
hahaha! :laugh:

[Kaoru]

Originally posted by Cady Goldfield
Maybe it's time for the personnel at Dave's base to be introduced to his Feminine Side. :p

Yeah, I guess I haven't paid a lot of attention to male courtship behavior in cultures where women aren't either protected or kept "virgin pure" for later barter. And of course, no guy ever came on to me that way because they had a healthy respect for my ability to rip their head off. My fiance has always been reaaalllly polite. :D

Wait a minute... Can you re-phrase this for me? What did you mean? Sorry for being dense! :D Did you mean they are kept they or aren't kept? :confused: If you mean what I think, it isn't always for barter. It is much valued and respected in some cultures and means a girl isn't easy. That's very good. It ought to be that way, IMHO.

If a guy ever ever wrote or said any of what the guy said to "Jo," He'd be so sent packing! I'd be much embarrassed and wouldn't like it.

Just my humble opinion... :)

[Soulend]

I was thinking of that too, Cady..that "Sam" is just playing along as well. I didn't realize it was possible for a man to get "wet", unless he has peed his pants or something. If he is just playing along though, he is continuing to run up his own phone bill just the same. :D

[Exorcist_Fist]

Sam could be a woman too. As I understand it, many times the people manning the mails are women...

Maybe she is just responding the way she thinks a trashy american girl would like...

BTW, if I win the lottery tomorrow, I will pay for David to fly to Nigeria wearing a stuffed bra, a blond wig, with a hidden camera in his hat...

[bgb]

hmmm...I agree with Daniel. If "Sam" thinks he is dealing with a trashy American he might think this is acceptable, or even a way to flatter Jo. I also can't see him picking up the charges for his phone calls unless he expected something out of it.

I'd love to see him wait at the airport for Jo. On the other hand, this might be a good time to tell him about the sex change operation, David.

Barb Bloom

[Cady Goldfield]

Carolyn,
In many cultures, girls and women are heavily controlled to keep them "virgin" until the father/male guardian finds a suitable groom. I in some cultures, the groom is also controlled by his own parents and the bride and groom are bartered together by the parents. In others, an older man - widowed or single - may purchase a young bride from her parents.

In any event, in such cultures, males who have sex before marriage seldom are chastised for it, while women may be ostracized, considered damaged goods, or even put to death. Note what is going on in Nigeria. Women who have sex out of wedlock and become pregnant are easy to "catch" and condemn to death, while their male companions get let go for lack of "evidence."

Dave,
It may become a game of who is the scammiest scammer. :D

[Jeff Cook]

David,

I think it's time you introduced a lesbian/bisexual/transgender factor.

What do you think?

Jeff Cook
Wabujitsu

[Soulend]

I thought I had included in a previous e-mail to him that I was really counting on this money in order to have my operation to make me a 'complete woman', but I can't find it now...so perhaps I didn't. I'll have to introduce the transgender element! Any suggestions as to specific verbiage? :D

Meanwhile..

Honey,

What a big relief, I thought you were mad at me, but did you actually mean I hadn't run foul against you? Thank you very much indeed.

Of course, I knew you can not arrive Lagos today, even if you are the President of the United State, it is not possible just like that. I mean if you can come to see me on your own convenient time, that will be memorable in my life.

Did you hear from Oak Resources? I sent a mail to them since Monday and they have not responded till this moment.

I have given the Court Registrar 700 this afternoon, I told him I will bring the balance of 650 on Friday, though I do not know how I could meet up, but I believe with God all things are possible.

Sugar Pie, I felt very bad yesterday, but today, I'm so glad that you have not forsaken me,

Respod without delay as usual and you can also send SMS, my handset has the facility to receive text messages.

Truly yours
Sam


Let's check Sam's story telling ability..


Dearest Sam,

No harm done..it was all my fault for sending those pictures anyway. Just a little surprising -

The last thing I got from Oak Resources was the following:

"Dear Ms. JoAnne,
I like to informed you that all relevant documents partaining to your claim has been received, verified and the property has been re-assigned in your name. Our partners in United Kingdom (Monumental Trust Co. ltd) that will handle the delivery process has been informed accordingly. They shall contact you soonest.
Please acknowledge receipt of this message.
Congratulations.
Yours faithfully,
William Howard
General Manager"

I have yet to hear anything from this 'Monumental Trust Co." How much do you know of this Oak Resources, Sam? Are they trustworthy? It seems odd to me that they use a Yahoo account instead of their company e-mail when conducting their business. Also kind of weird is the fact that their e-mails come from Lagos - I was under the impression that they were located in the UK. Perhaps I can visit their offices when I visit Nigeria. I'm so looking forward to meeting you in person, Sam. Of course, it would be nice to hear from these 'Monumental Trust' people before I send more money - but I feel that through our faith in the Almighty everything will turn out for the best.

Love,

Jo

[Cady Goldfield]

"Sugar Pie"?! :laugh:


I notice that the word "soonest" (as in, "they shall contact you soonest") turns up in Mr. Howard's and Sam's messages. That must be the wacky way everyone talks in Lagos. ;)

[Jeff Cook]

That's pretty good, but I think subtlety will be more entertaining, such as, "Back when I was called Bob...." or "I remember when I was in the Boy Scouts...."

Maybe a mention of a trip to Switzerland for a medical procedure to have an outie made into an innie....

Gunny, you're the master at this; I feel inadequate giving you ideas!

Jeff Cook
Wabujitsu

[Soulend]

Sweet Heart,

Thanks for your mail.

There is nothing absolutely wrong by your act of exchanging pictures, it is natural. I am the one to take the blame for not being able to control my feelings.. You are faultless in this case, but I’m glad you did not reckon with my misbehaviour. However, in the contrary, any man who appreciates the good artistic work of God when HE moulded you, can easily misbehave the same way I did. I am a man with normal blood pressure, I do recognize good creatures when I see one, therefore, I think, in away, I have right to nurse ambition to look up for attractive Angel like you. After all, I have not seen any sane person who does not go for the best.

On business, Oak Resources is just an agent or shall I say, a link! The main brain behind it is Monumental Trust.

For your information, Cotonou and Lagos are almost like one town to the extent that there are people who reside in Cotonou, but comes to work in Lagos everyday. Even in some parts of Cotonou, you can use phone with Lagos area code and when it comes to internet, Cotonou subscribed to ISP in Lagos..

Please, be rest assure, all will be fine, but you can write Oak to inform them that you are yet to hear from London. I don’t want to be too forward so that they wouldn’t have cause to think otherwise. You understand what I mean, they must not know that I have a stake in the business.

Awaiting to receiving from you.

Take good care of yourself till we meet.

Sincerely yours.
Sam

......


Hi dear,

I wrote to Oak Resources again. Hopefully will hear something from Monumental Trust soon. Funny, back when I was still called Bob and not yet a real woman we had a company in our town called Monumental Trust. They were a monumental bust after a few years though, much like my own.

Oh, Sam, you really must stop flattering me so. :)

Love,
JoAnne

[ace862]

However, in the contrary, any man who appreciates the good artistic work of God when HE moulded you, can easily misbehave the same way I did.


I think good ol' Sam just gave you an opening to work in the transgender issue. This is just way too funny. It boggles my mind that anyone could actually fall for these scams.

[pgsmith]

That's pretty good David! I almost spit coffee on my keyboard! Back when I was still called Bob?

I wonder what he's going to have to say about that! :D

[Soulend]

Hehe..I got Jeff to thank for that one. Wonder if he'll even realize what I'm talking about..

[Exorcist_Fist]

Between you and Jeff, I have learned to fear the military mind.

[Cady Goldfield]

Originally posted by Silent Dan
Between you and Jeff, I have learned to fear the military mind.

I can't help adding that the US-Iraq situation would have worked out much better if we'd had guys like Dave and Jeff planning the strategy and tactics. :D

[bgb]

David,

After you get done playing with Sam I have another letter I'd like you to look at! :p

This one says my loan application has been approved. Alls I need to do is get back to them with a few details (yeah, like my credit card number maybe).

It is extrememly poorly written.

Anyone know where an e-mail with this address plala.or.jp would be generated from? I don't recognize the suffixes.

Barb Bloom

[Mekugi]

Yeah, this is true. We call it "my entire family" were I come from.

Originally posted by Cady Goldfield

In many cultures, girls and women are heavily controlled to keep them "virgin" until the father/male guardian finds a suitable groom.

[Soulend]

.jp is a Japanese server, Barb..of course that doesn't mean very much. Sam's stuff comes through Yahoo's UK server and I have some that are sent through German and Spanish ones. Need to check the IP headers to find the point of origin.

Seems Sam's got the fever (possibly for the flavor):

Honey,

Thanks a lot. Mind you, I am telling you what you are. Maybe you
did not know exactly that you are a good person and a pretty young
lady. I have no reason to flatter you, James should confirm it to
you.

Honey, I'm down with fever, I hope I will get better soon.

Truly yous
Sam

Time to put business aside and show some compassion for the poor soul.

My Dearest Sam,

I am so sorry to hear that you are ill! Have you seen a doctor? There are some very bad fevers in Africa, so I am very worried. Please get some good medicine and not simply have someone dance around a fire with a bone in his nose or a plate in his lip like one sees on National Geographic.

Please get better soon Sam - get plenty of rest. I will pray for your health everyday.

Yours,
Jo

[bgb]

Cripes, David, that was horrible! :D :D :D

Barb Bloom

[Exorcist_Fist]

Barb,

My service provider is Plala.co.jp. I think this may unfortunately not be a coincidence, as I have been having some viral problems and issues with the security on my wireless system. ((I had to reformat my PC last night. Damn near lost my law school apps.))

If you can be a dear and PM me the address of the sender, I will at least be able to find out if my system has been hijacked.

Regards,

D

[Soulend]

I foresee a plea for monetary help for Sam and his "fever"..and by Saturday night too. :D

[Tripitaka of AA]

David, my mind has been playing on the transgender notification... which is foolish really as you have played this game so well that you obviously don't lack ideas for yourself.

I was thinking of lines like;

"I wanted to be a cheerleader, but my school was very strict. They always made me hold the place-kicker's balls."

"Locker-rooms at school can be very cruel... you know how boys can be!"

"James says that I am a great Wide Reciever, but I usually prefer to take it from behind
the line of scrimmage"



As for "fever"... yep, requests for medicine money would seem a likely next step. What could you do? Add his name to the mailing lists for a zillion "Prozac" subscription chemists? How about a recipe for your Mom's home remedy for fevers:- Hot Lemon and Honey, with a pinch of sennakot and a spoonful of Milt.

[Jeff Cook]

Good stuff Davids! Is it a coincidence that the Davids I know are smart and funny guys?

I'm wondering if JoAnne should sympathize with the poor ill man, possibly by relating a story about her bout with testicular cancer that put her in the hospital, perhaps helping influence her decision to have the nip-tuck procedure called "addadicktomy."

Jeff Cook
Wabujitsu

[Finny]

hehehe

I laughed my @ss off at the "bone in his nose or plate in his lip" line.

Classic.

[Soulend]

Yay..two faxes last night from "Monumental Trust". I didn't act on it yet because I was busy carving a jack-o'-lantern. Pretty interesting..it says that the consignment has been received in the UK and I need to go to their offices to pick it up. Now, as the money has already been put in my name and resides in England, why would there be any need to grease some Nigerian judge?

They even have a website, which looks pretty good if you discount the odd spelling error: http://www.monumentaltrust.com

The address and phone number given is:

21A Garlick close
London
United Kingdom
EC2A 4AU
Phone: +44 782 187 1797

Perhaps one of our members who lives in London could tell me if this is even a real address and phone number, or what actually is at this address?

[John Anderson]

I can't find that street name or postcode on any map or other reference for London, so it's a fake.
The phone number may be real but if it is, it's a mobile telephone, not a London telephone connected to a landline.

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA
David, my mind has been playing on the transgender notification...

I just found this thread; funny stuff!

One possible suggestion, playing on his fever: you could mention how important finding a good doctor is. "When I had my sex-change surgery I really learned how important the doctor/patient relationship is."

Something like that.

It's not exactly subtle, but he didn't seem to catch the "when my name was Bob" bit.

[Soulend]

Thanks, Mr. Anderson...I thought as much. I was half hoping that it would be an club or something though so I could work it in somehow.:D

Yeah Brian, the language barrier combined with the fact that ol' Sam isn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed makes subtlety something of a wasted exercise. Let's roll with it!

My Dear Sam,

How are you today? I've been extremely worried about you with the state of your health. Please write back and let me know how you are doing.

I have good news however - Monumental Trust has faxed me documents to the effect that the consignment is being held in my name and that I must go to London and pick it up. I'm packing for the trip right now! This also means that there is no need to bribe anyone, as an order from a Nigerian judge carries no weight in the UK. I checked this with barrister John Anderson, a friend of mine who lives and practices law in Wales. The English apparently frown on the sort of corruption that seems so commonplace in Nigeria.

This is so exciting! Through the grace of Almighty God we have prevailed, and are only days away from getting the money. The first thing I'm doing is donating some of my share to The Jeff Cook Christian Home for Wayward Strippers to show my thanks to the Lord. Then, if your fever has not completely abated, you must allow me to introduce you to my physician, Dr. Owens. He is a medical wonder - treats all my ailments and even performed my sex-change operation and breast augments back in 2000.

Please let me know that you are alright. I hope that you can travel next week to London so we can meet..I'm already getting my documents together to secure a visa, and looking at different itineraries.

Thinking of you,
Jo

[Tripitaka of AA]

This thread, is going to end up in a magazine or book someday...

EC2A would make it somewhere in East Central part of the midde of London... as this site says;

London EC2 incorporates some 1,441 postcodes. at its widest point is 2.9 miles by 2.4 miles in length.

These 1,441 postcodes are home to over 1,025 LondonTown.com featured venues. There are 282 Restaurants, 366 Shops, 65 Sights of interest, 195 clubs and pubs and 52 leisure venues

EC2A 4AT and EC2A 4AW are both shown as in the "Old Street/City Road" neighbourhood, but the maps don't show that street. Off the top of my head, I'd say it was a good place for a postal drop-off or a dingy one-room office. The Wine Bars and trendy restaurants get busy enough, but the overall impression is of dull faceless buildings with no publicised purpose. The only attempt at a shopping area is the tiny collecton of spaces in the underground precinct at the entrance to the Old Street station (Metropolitan, Northern and Hammersmth & City Lines, on the London Underground).

Perhaps Monkeyboy can find the street on his "A to Z", but I've lost mine.

[Charles Hammond]

There is no Garlick Close in London but there is a Garlick Hill in EC4 near Mansion House tube.

[Cady Goldfield]

The address thing is merely moot now. :D When Sam reads the bombshell Dave's blonde bombshell just dropped, I doubt he'll be back. Unless, of course, he is really just intent on getting some money from JoAnne, regardless of gender.

[Jeff Cook]

Damn, Gunny, the sound of the approaching bus you just threw me under is rather disconcerting....

Actually, I am quite proud to be a part of your sick and devious activity. Hooah!

Jeff Cook
Wabujitsu

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by Soulend
...you must allow me to introduce you to my physician, Dr. Owens. He is a medical wonder...

"Doctor Owens." Gee; my dad would have been so proud. :D

[Tripitaka of AA]

What do we think "Honey"'s next post will read like? Will he suddenly go all cold and business-like, finishing off with an assertively mascuine phrase like "How 'bout those Red Sox?".

Or perhaps it will excite him to greater heights of Keats inspired poetic rapture! Expect two dozen roses... by fax :).

Or will he be crushed. Suicidal in his disappointment (this is the third good prospect that he's lost this week), he may be driven to lie once more with the dark ladies of the night, in the seedy parts of Lagos that hs mother warned him about. Or maybe even those attractive young boys that always follow him around flaunting themselves...

A man of such "good character" driven by such distasteful greed and lust... should we revile him, or pity him. I wonder what the great and devout JoAnne will offer him as sympathy. Perhaps her final parting gift, when it comes, shall offer some chance of salvation by confessing his sins, repenting and working in a charitable way for the good people of Lagos. Or will she tell the little sh1t to clean up his act and find a decent job before she arranges for him to wake up from some uninvited surgery far less of a man than he used to be...[Hannbal Lecter voiceover]"you must allow me to introduce you to my physician, Dr. Owens. He is a medical wonder"[/Hannibal V/O] :D

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA
...she arranges for him to wake up from some uninvited surgery far less of a man than he used to be...[Hannbal Lecter voiceover]"you must allow me to introduce you to my physician, Dr. Owens. He is a medical wonder"[/Hannibal V/O] :D

Ah, a bilateral orchiectomy (http://www.beavercleaver.net/yourgoodies.JPG) -- with fauva beans and a nice chianti.

But first, the anesthesia -- :smash:

[Tripitaka of AA]

Holy Cojones! (Wholly? or thinly sliced perhaps :D ).

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA
Holy Cojones! (Wholly? or thinly sliced perhaps :D ).
The site where that photo originated is an odd mix of medical information and off beat humor.

At the bottom of the page showing the complete orchiectomy there is a link to a page with a recipe for Rocky Mountain "Oysters." :eek:

Here's the page: Orchiectomy Procedure Slides (http://www.beavercleaver.net/orchiectomy_slides.htm) [Warning: Contains unretouched pictures of male sexual organs...and surgery on same.]

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Checked the address and can't come up with anything, but got the same as Charles Hammond did.

I can go check it out if you want? I can put on uniform of some sort if you want. maybe Rent-A-Kill?

If you want me to call the mobile phone number just say:

I need to talk to David though to figure out what sort of game we want to play with it, I did drama at school and can do accents quite well.

Brain storming welcome ;)

[Soulend]

Hehe, Matt, you're the coolest. Let's see if he writes back and maybe we can come up with something..

Haven't heard from him since the 'fever' e-mail.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
Hehe, Matt, you're the coolest. Let's see if he writes back and maybe we can come up with something..

Haven't heard from him since the 'fever' e-mail.

Just let me know what to do when your devilish mind comes up with something :D

Cheers :beer:

[monkeyboy_ssj]

The monumental trust is very interesting...here is what I've found out.

Garlick Hill is very close to the wrong post code and is very much in the right area...doing a domain check I found this. it's called Monumental Trust and is very near the area of london called 'Monument'

http://www.checkdomain.com/cgi-bin/checkdomain.pl?domain=www.monumentaltrust.com

It's owned by a man in texas call Emmaunel Mona but his email is emiheskey@yahoo.com which is a play on the England footballer Emil Heskey showing that he's got a clue about football in England...which I find strange.

I doubt this person is in Texas as what it states some how...I think I might go and check it out...maybe try and get them back at there own game...I might give the phone a call and record it too.

I think that the website is a dummy one and this Emmaunel Mona is in on these scams too...

Let us know what people think I should do.

[Tripitaka of AA]

Don't forget the Golden Rule Ninja-Monkey-Matty-Boy

Only play this game from inside a large miltary base protected by the finest military hardware that US Dollars can buy.

The honourable Mr Craik didn't get where he is today by wandering up a dark alley looking for a shadowy mess of greedy, hungry, sexually frustrated Internet-Fiends with a taste for blood. We wouldn't want our favourite Matty-Balls served up with Chianti or beans of any description. NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR THE RETURN OF DR STUPID!!


But then again, having wandered the streets of London in a black dogi and geta for the last few years, you're probably well-used to dealing with unwanted attention. I don't suppose anyone will give you a second glance.;)

... just remember, let the shadows be your friend, set your phone to "Withhold Number, All Calls" (or dial 1470 before ringing).

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA
Don't forget the Goden Rule Ninja-Monkey-Matty-Boy

Only play this game from inside a large miltary base protected by the finest mitary hardware that US Dollars can buy[/b].

The honourable Mr Craik didn't get where he is today by wandering up a dark alley looking for a shadowy mess of greedy, hungry, sexually frustrated Internet-Fiends with a taste for blood. We wouldn't want our favourite Matty-Balls served up with Chianti or beans of any description. NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR THE RETURN OF DR STUPID!!


heh, I know ;) I was just going to walk down the road and scope it out, no ninja missions yet. Anyway, Dr. Stupid is making a planned return over the Christmas period :D

But then again, having wandered the streets of London in a black dogi and geta for the last few years, you're probably well-used to dealing with unwanted attention. I don't suppose anyone will give you a second glance.

You know me too well :D

I think people are more scared of me when I wear my shoes that don't make sound when I walk and I mostly wear black clothes anyway so the amount of people I get freaking out as I walk past them is not rare.

London isn't that scary as long as you remeber the golden rule. If in trouble, flipout like a ninja ;)

Cheers

[Soulend]

To Mr Bloam

Msg from Mr Saanko

He is in addmission for extreme high BP, stress
induced.

You may like to talk with him via
Tel # 234 803 839 9580

Mrs Adebisi Ige
Lab Technologist


I wonder if this stress was caused by my revelation that JoAnne's apple once had a stem on it. Of course my previous smelting accident precludes me from calling ol' Sam. I'll send my condolences tonight though.

Good sleuthing, Matt, and anything you could work from your end would be great. Like the other David said, don't do anything that may put yourself in danger though. These guys seem to have cronies all over the place that are in on their scams.

[MikeWilliams]

Originally posted by Soulend
I wonder if this stress was caused by my revelation that JoAnne's apple once had a stem on it.

:laugh:

[Cady Goldfield]

:laugh:
At least Sam had the courtesy to have "someone" write back for him.
Might be time to look for a new scammer to scam. There's no shortage of letters from which to choose.

[Holappa]

This is too good to believe,i've never had so much fun reading these post's,keep up the good work:D p.s this is mad as hell:D

[mokonotora]

I did not need to see those photos. I cringed.

Therefore I thought, Gee, Maybe we could send them to Sam. I mean people video tape births all the time now, why wouldn't some rich guy, er, um girl, or um a thing or whatever the PC term is vidoe tape her "Birth" as a girl. Sending a few choice photos of the ole man parts before they went off to be bronzed as book ends and a nice pen holder on the desk.

Other than that, brilliant stuff gentlemen.

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by mokonotora
I did not need to see those photos. I cringed.

I warned you that they'd be graphic! :saw:

[Exorcist_Fist]

I like how it says Mr. Bloam.

Too bad the mispelling precludes us from assuming it was intentional.

[Soulend]

I hope he gets better soon. It may well be time to jump on a new one, but there are still so many unrealized possibilities with this guy.

[Soulend]

Honey,

Thanks for your mails, thanks for your concerned over my ill health.

I thought it was the usual high fever which has been my sickness over the years and I was on with my normal medication. On Friday night I was not myself and the only option is to rush me to the Hospital and I have remained on drip until Monday evening.

However, there is a big problem, the test confirms that my blood pressure is very high and there wasn't enough Oxygen in my lungs for normal respiration. All these were as a result of an enlarge Appendicitis which can only be removed through minor surgical operation according to the Doctor. This the trouble I found myself right now.

To enable my blood pressure fully stabilized, I am expected to facethe Surgeon's blade this Saturday in view of the that it coulddevelop to Heart failure if nothing is done urgently. The estimated cost is put at 1500 and I am supposed to deposit half the operation commences, this is the big factor. As Oliver Twist who cannot stop asking for more, I am therefore appealing for help from kind hearted people like you. Any amount will be gracefully appreciated.. Honey, no hard feelings if you can not assist because I believe in destiny and if I am destined to return to the soil through this illness, no amount of donation can change it.

As regards to our business, you can go ahead, no problem whatsoever. After the transaction in London, please make effort to breeze into Lagos for one or two days if you have the time, it is just 6 hours flight. But, most importantly, if my situation turns out the worst, my junior and only Brother (Sylvester Sanko) will contact you and I am 110% confidence that you will be good to him as far as the business is concerned, From day one, I knew you are a good person and since then, my mind has never been in doubt about your sincerity. May the good Lord be with you now and always, however pray for me, maybe I could live and we will surely meet ourselves in a day to be appointed by God

I have paid the Court 500 last Friday, my junior Brother went round andCame up with the money. It is only 150 outstanding.

Happy election, but tell me, are you for BUSH or KERRY? For us over here, we have had enough of Bush, we need a change, I think the entire World is tired of war

Least I forget, you don’t require visa to UK as long as you have American Passport and please let me know when exactly you will be leaving for London.

I must confess, the test and Doctor's surgical advise as the only option of removing appendice has really created fear in me, I hope it comes out well, that is if there is fund to go for the surgery, I need the prayers and help of everyone of you over there. By the way, if you can not call, you can send a text message, OK.

Truly yours

Sam

[Cady Goldfield]

Me too! Did I not say that perhaps his greed would overcome any aversion to JoAnne's gender issues? :D

[nicojo]

Oliver Twist? Huh. Sam's a literate fellow.

Sly and the Family Sanko, no less.

[Tripitaka of AA]

It's such a shame he won't be able to travel to London :(.

But you know, when you are returning to the soil, there's no room for life's little pleasures.

What's the going rate for an appendectomy these days? Perhaps he coud try one of those psychic surgeons, you know, the ones that use their bare hands! Does anyone have a Link?

Mind you, with all her experience under the Surgeon's blade, at least Sanko senior can expect a sympathetic ear from JoAnne. Could we send him one by post? Does she know any surgeons workng in Lagos? Are there any listed on the Net at universities or what-not?

[Soulend]

Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
The monumental trust is very interesting...here is what I've found out.

Garlick Hill is very close to the wrong post code and is very much in the right area...doing a domain check I found this. it's called Monumental Trust and is very near the area of london called 'Monument'


Hey Matt, perhaps I'm being a bit dense, but am I to gather that the server for monumentaltrust.com is located at Garlick Hill, near the area known as 'Monument'?

Odd, I'm surprised that this Monumental Trust isn't listed on my handy fake banks list. (http://www.aa419.org/419-fake-bank-websites.shtml)

Well, time to fly 'cross the pond again, I guess.

My Dearest Sam,

I'm so happy to hear that you are out of hospital, although of course I am still very worried about you. A lady from the hospital lab e-mailed me and said it was only stress. I guess she was wrong!

I took two weeks off from work and I am off to London tomorrow morning and just as soon as business is concluded there I can either wire you the money from England or bring it personally in Lagos. Do not worry in the slightest about paying for the operation, love, because you are going to have the best care available. Just take good care of yourself and join me in thanks to Almighty God that everything will soon be alright. Do not worry - having an appendix removed is not a difficult procedure, I had mine removed as a preventative measure along with my purple-helmeted love soldier with no complications whatsoever. You are not going to return to the nightsoil, so have no worries.

I didn't vote for Bush or Kerry, actually. Lately the major candidates have not been very good in my opinion. So I voted for Mike Williams of the Guinness party. He is probably little-known outside of the US, and hasn't a hope of winning, but he makes a legendary curry that burns you twice, so what the heck. James used to be a soldier and voted for George Bush...I guess the "Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?" thing really resonated with him.

I will continue to pray until we meet, Sam. Please relax as much as possible. I have put my itinerary to London below:

Outbound Flight


Wed, Nov 03
11:28am Depart - Savannah, GA (SAV) United Airlines 5429 operated by /UNITED EXPRESS/AWAC Adult Fare Rules

1:00pm Arrive - Chicago-Ohare, IL (ORD) Nonstop
Flight time: 2 hrs 32 min

Connection Time: 3 hrs 15 min



Wed, Nov 03
4:15pm Depart - Chicago-Ohare, IL (ORD) United Airlines 958 Adult Fare Rules

Thu, Nov 04
5:55am Arrive - London Heathrow, UK (LHR) Nonstop
Flight time: 7 hrs 40 min

Total Travel Time: 13 hrs 27 min

Attachment:

[Cady Goldfield]

<i>purple helmeted love soldier</i>...?! BWA-HAHAHAHAHA!!! :laugh:

[Tripitaka of AA]

Honey's blood pressure just broke the sphygmomanometer (I've been dying to use that word, could you guess!).

All his dreams, about to come true!!

But wait, there's a hitch...

There isn't any money in London... so the pot of gold does not exist... so Darling Angel Yankee Beauty Goddess will be disappointed and may not come to Lagos after all :( Whatever shall he do?

Now if only he can find a way to get JoAnne to come to Lagos, even without the money. Perhaps there is a busness opportunity... or a health issue.. or maybe he could send some more roses (they seemed to go down well before)...

[MikeWilliams]

Originally posted by Soulend
I voted for Mike Williams of the Guinness party. He is probably little-known outside of the US, and hasn't a hope of winning, but he makes a legendary curry that burns you twice, so what the heck

It's funny 'cos it's true. Vote Guinness!

:beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer:

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
Hey Matt, perhaps I'm being a bit dense, but am I to gather that the server for monumentaltrust.com is located at Garlick Hill, near the area known as 'Monument'?

Odd, I'm surprised that this Monumental Trust isn't listed on my handy fake banks list. (http://www.aa419.org/419-fake-bank-websites.shtml)



Sorta, The address that they supplied for on the fax from Monumental Trust doesn't exist, as it says Garlick Close.

But Garlick Hill is a street in London which is located around the area of London known as 'Monument' which I find strange. As it's called Monumental Trust, I'm going to swing past the road on the way home from work tonight.

Maybe they are trying to cover there tracks a bit by making mistakes on purpose in the address so if they do need to use the real address for the company (which I think is a fake empty office with a telephone) you wouldn't notice the change from the fake to real one as the look and sound the same. That's what I think anyway.

The server is registered in Texas, but that wouldn't make sense for a company in London. I think it's a fake registry.

But it might not be right...

[Soulend]

Ok, cool. Watch, there will be a huge building marked 'Monumental Trust' on Garlick hill..then I can fax you the documents, you throw on a wig, and bingo - you're rich!

I sent www.monumentaltrust.com to Artists Against 419, so get your last looks in before that website dies. There's going to be a rather upset fellow in Texas (if he is in Texas) once his server's crippled. :D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
Ok, cool. Watch, there will be a huge building marked 'Monumental Trust' on Garlick hill..then I can fax you the documents, you throw on a wig, and bingo - you're rich!

I never need and excuse to throw on a wig :D

That doesn't sound like how it was ment to come out...

I'm just curious at the moment to see what is there!

I'll try and take a picture with my camera phone tonight, if you need any pictures taken for your 'trip' to London then just let us know.

:toast:

[Soulend]

Great Matt..is there an option on your camera phone where the time and date can be stamped onto each picture?

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
Great Matt..is there an option on your camera phone where the time and date can be stamped onto each picture?

only in the file name...I tell you what, I'll borrow my Dad's digital camera that way it will look professional with date and time, I can take pictures of anything you'd think was funny.

Maybe the Nigerian Embassy or where ever he comes from? ;)

[Soulend]

That's a wonderful idea! I was just wondering about the date and time thing because it will make the pictures *somewhat* prove that I am there...even though JoAnne won't appear in them. Perhaps some landmarks for which London is famous...and of course, whatever is at 21A Garlick Hill. :D

It would be cool if it's actually a pub or something there. I could tell him there wasn't any bank there so I just hung around and got pissed.

Man, this lends such an international flavour to it all. I love it! By the way..do you know if the number given for monumental trust would be long distance for you? I can't find "782", although "1782" appears to be Stoke-on-Trent.

[Tripitaka of AA]

Now if only I still had my lfe-size cardboard cut-out of Pam!! Matt could have had fun taking his "friend" around the sights :D

Incidentally, she must have been in town recently, as she was in a TV interview last Saturday night (Little Ant and Lttle Dec, for the Brits who stay in on a Saturday night)... maybe there are some publicity shots of her about town that might be usable.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA
Now if only I still had my lfe-size cardboard cut-out of Pam!! Matt could have had fun taking his "friend" around the sights :D

Incidentally, she must have been in town recently, as she was in a TV interview last Saturday night (Little Ant and Lttle Dec, for the Brits who stay in on a Saturday night)... maybe there are some publicity shots of her about town that might be usable.

She was doing a book signing in Piccadilly Circus, I've been asking Routers if they've got any pictures but they don't look that great...could have been taken anywhere :(

Oh well...

[Tripitaka of AA]

Phone: +44 782 187 1797

It isn't a London number, or a national landline.
All numbers that start with a "7" are for Mobiles now (well, "07" if you're dialling from a UK landline), so it should be a mobile. Not sure which network it would be though. I wonder if it would re-route to Nigeria if the Mobile had been set-up for Roaming.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA
It isn't a London number, or a national landline.
All numbers that start with a "7" are for Mobiles now (well, "07" if you're dialling from a UK landline), so it should be a mobile. Not sure which network it would be though. I wonder if it would re-route to Nigeria if the Mobile had been set-up for Roaming.

Hmmm, I think it might be on Orange as looking through my phone book I found an 0781 which is almost the same sometimes change the last number...shall I call it?

It can't re route me as if I dial no intervational code then it won't dail outside. I can call it from a pay phone from down the road...

I can just say I dailed the wrong number. Or even ask for a name? :D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

scratch that.

it's might be O2.

I've been clever and done a search on Sim cards on Ebay and found this:

http://64.233.183.104/search?q=cache:yO9q-8f2gssJ:phones.listings.ebay.co.uk/Sim-Cards_W0QQfromZR10QQsacategoryZ29778QQsocmdZListingItemListQQsosortorderZ2QQsosortpropertyZ3+0782+or ange+mobile&hl=en

Is definatly a UK number though...

EDIT: it's a pay as you go old O2 phone when it used to be called Genie network. Bingo.

[Cady Goldfield]

<b>If Sam peters out (heh heh), here's our potential next mark:</b>

FROM: "Dr. Shehu Sani." <drshuhesani@gawab.com> | Save Address
DATE: Wed, 3 Nov 2004 18:39:31 +0100
TO: Cady G
SUBJECT: My Compliment to you.


From: Dr. Shehu Sani,

Dear Friend,

My Compliment to you,

I guess this letter may come to you as a surprise since I had no previous correspondence with you.

I am sending you this mail on behalf of the chairman tender board of Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) MR. SETTLEY DAZE. We got your contact in our search for a reliable person to handle a very confidential transaction involving the transfer of Forty Nine Million, Five Hundred Thosand United States Dollars US$49.5Million.

The above fund is not connected with arms, drugs or money laundering. It is the product of an over invoiced Contract awarded in 2001 by INEC to a foreign company for the construction of high rise estate in the federal capital territory.

The contract has long been executed and payment of the actual contract amount has been paid to the foreign contractor leaving the balance, which my colleague and I now want to transfer out of Nigeria into a reliable foreign account for our personal use.

As civil servants we are not allowed to run foreign accounts. Hence we have chosen you to front and support us as the beneficiary to be paid. If you are interested in the proposal kindly get back to me by sending me your letter of acceptance along with your direct telephone and fax numbers, For your support and partnership, please reply me to negotiate your fees or the percentage you wish to be paid when the funds arrive your bank account.

Further details about this transaction will be discussed in the subsequent correspondence. Note also that the particular nature of your business is irrelevant to this transaction and all local contacts and arrangements are in place for a smooth and successful conclusion of this transaction.

Be informed that we are aware of the way email proposals of this type are being sent from this part of africa and as regards that, you should please treat this with utmost attention knowing fully well that you cannot and will not be compelled to assist us if you are not disposed to.

Contact me via my email account or you also reach me on this email account sani_s9@hotmail.com with your contact telephone and fax numbers on response, I will call you for a discussion.

Thank you as I await your response.

Sincerely,

Dr. Shehu Sani..

[Soulend]

My Dear Sam,

Hello from London! I hope so much that this e-mail finds you OK, and not too sick. I am very worried about you as always.

I've had a little problem since arriving. I have asked the people at the hotel and the taxi driver about the address for Monumental Trust, on Garlick Close. They don't know of any road named Garlick Close. I had my assistant try to call them, but it only makes a "click, click, click" like the number is for a mobile phone and it cannot connect.

The taxi driver says there is a place called Garlick Hill, in a part of London called "monument", so perhaps the address on their documents was an error. I am going to try and find it tomorrow, because I am very tired from travelling.

Please write me back because I am very concerned about your ill health Sam.

Love You,
Jo


If you have any photos or info, Matt, I could sure use it :D

[Exorcist_Fist]

David, I don't think Sam really got the idea that Jo used to be a man. Maybe you should send him a shot of Jude Law, and say that's what you used to look like.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Soulend
If you have any photos or info, Matt, I could sure use it :D

I'll get on it later on ;)

[Tripitaka of AA]

Or Leonardo Di Caprio maybe or Axl Rose (of Gns 'n' Roses) ...or John Malkevich!:eek: or

Or even Matt Boxall :D




But seriously. Where does it go now? JoAnne is not going to get any money, but she has proven her commitment. I can't guess what Herr Sanko will ask next. He has a "rube" and now he needs to squeeze some money that will actually go in HIS pocket (not just on hotels and air tickets.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA

Or even Matt Boxall :D


:mad:

...And what are you trying to say?

[Soulend]

Might have lost him anyway..haven't heard from him in a few days.

[monkeyboy_ssj]

he's probably scared you are going to hunt him down and get 'friendly'

:D

[Tripitaka of AA]

Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
:mad:

...And what are you trying to say?

That such a transformaton from a manly man of undoubted good looks would be so startling as to make the desire for change difficult to fathom.. errr... I guess :(


It is such a shame that Mr Sanko has retrned to the soil (hee-hee, "Nght-Soil" :laugh: ). Such a shame that a good Christian should come to such a sticky end, all over an avaricious scheme to gain incredible wealth. Serves him right.:p

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Tripitaka of AA
That such a transformaton from a manly man of undoubted good looks would be so startling as to make the desire for change difficult to fathom.. errr... I guess :(



Ok, now you're taking the piss :p :D

I think it would be better if we chose someone who didn't look like a girl in the first place... :D

:beer:

[Cady Goldfield]

Originally posted by monkeyboy_ssj
I think it would be better if we chose someone who didn't look like a girl in the first place... :D


Ernest Borgnine!!!
http://www2.una.edu/library/borgnine/

:D

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by Cady Goldfield
Ernest Borgnine!!!
http://www2.una.edu/library/borgnine/

:D

Now that's a man's man :D

[Cady Goldfield]

Here's my favorite Borgnine closeup...

http://www2.una.edu/library/borgnine/port13.htm

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by Cady Goldfield
Here's my favorite Borgnine closeup...

I vote for Gene Hackman. If we can find a shot of him from the final scene in The Birdcage we could even have a "before, during, and after" photo sequence. :D

[Tripitaka of AA]

From Ernest Borgnine to Pam Anderson... WOW, that is some TOP SURGEON!! :nw: :nw: :nw:

I wonder if he could make me look like Tom Cruise, or would it end up like Michael Jackson - looking like a cheap plastc imitation of my sister :(

[Soulend]

Honey,

Oak Resources was equally very angry with your action. They said you did not find it necessary to respond to their fax, they needed to find out who you are and all that. They said a business of that magnitude requires a proper arrangement. They said it was not enough to receive a fax message and board a plane with no attempt to acknowledge the receipt.

According to them, anybody can pick up the fax message, how would they know you are the right person when they do not have your signature, no picture and no previous correspondence, but the next they hear was that you are in London searching for them. Of course they delibrately did not use the right address for Security reasons such as the present sitution, they felt, if you are the right person, you should have
interacted with them and perhaps obtain more details including the
requirement to releasing the consignment to you, the idea of arriving
London without their knowledge when they are suppose to receive you
as their guest and in addition, not a single correspondent form you,
indeed suggest to them that you might be an impersonator, they
summerised.

However, the important factor is that you would take the final
delivery of the box in Holland, these are the details that would
have been given to you if your journey was known to them. You are
expected to understand that it is not the kind of business which is
100% open to the public especially in Europe, therefore, it has to
be delivered in a safe heaven for both parties and that place is
Holland, The Netherland,

Honey. in my personal opinion, is it true you did not inform them
as regards to your arrival? You did not respond to their letter? If
you ask me, that was a big un-coordinated attempt on your part, but I
hope it wouldn't be exactly how they explained it as above. I would
like to know how you did organize the journey in brief.

Finally, it will be a better idea if you can go back to the US, we can
make a better arrangement where you have inform them with the date of your arrival, they have to obtain your identity and they have to confirm the
appointment. This is the way we can get it done right. Nevertheless,
no hope is lost except that your manner of approach was fraught with
suspicion, that is the thinking of the Security Company, I can't blame
them either, after all, that is why they are in SECURITY businss.

Respond immediately please

Truly Yours
Sam

Whoa, an admonishment...

Sam,

There were no instructions with the fax that I needed to respond to it. These "Oak Resources" people must be a bunch of idiots. "They needed to find out who I am"? How the hell can they do that by e-mail or a telephone call? I could be anyone. It is precisely because this transaction is so important that I came in person - and can thus show them my original passport, driver's license, etc. - in person. You cannot get more secure than that. Besides, Monumental Trust instructed me to come pick up the consignment in person, in London. They even gave me their business hours. So Oak resources can take it up with Monumental trust.

Why should they be angry when they have lost nothing? I am the one who has now lost several thousand dollars in this venture so far due to their haphazard planning and nonsense. Tell you what, Sam. Let them know that whenever they are finished playing silly little games like putting wrong addresses on their letterheads and giving me wrong instructions then I will be ready to proceed. I have come halfway around the world for nothing. If sending people on wild goose chases is their idea of "security" then I don't have much confidence in them.

Jo

[Soulend]

Fired off another:

Dear Sam,

Attached is the fax I received. Read the second page - it says "Having concluded the shipping arrangement, you are hereby requested to come to our office here in London UK between 9:30 - 1600 Hrs GMT Monday through Friday to inspect your consignment and reconfirm your delivery address before we commence with the shipment." So that is what I attempted to do. Perhaps the Oak Resources people should have a look at that before they start getting angry, eh?

Sam, what would you think of me coming to visit before heading back to the States?

Love,
Jo

[ace862]

Finally, it will be a better idea if you can go back to the US,
Such shabby treatment!!! I'm sure Jo(e) would have never stood for that kind of attitude when she was a man! :mad: Why is it that now he's a she, men think they can talk like that to her. LOL Keep pushing the issue.

[Soulend]

FEDERAL MINISTRY OF JUSTICE
MARINA, P.M.B. 125157, LAGOS.
TEL: 234-1-7748123, FAX: 01-7594254
SATELLITE PHONE: 870-761607542, FAX; 870-761607544
E-Mail: justice_akin@myway.com

MR. AKIN OLUJIMI (SAN)
Attorney General/Honourable Minister of State

AUTOMATIC STOP ORDER ON THE RELEASE OF YOUR OUTSTANDING PAYMENT.

Be dully informed that with immediate effect under my capacity as the Attorney General/Honourable Minister of State, your payment has been stopped automatically.

This action was been necessitated due to the fact that your so-called Nigerian representatives refused to pay me my service/professional fees after assisting them to Legalise/Process the Final Release of your Outstanding Payment with this Ministry (Federal Ministry of Justice). I also wrote a letter of recommendation to the Federal Ministry of Finance for Foreign Exchange Allocation to your Company and you as the Fund Beneficiary based on the bogus promises that were been made to me by your so called Nigerian representatives.

In fact, I want you to know that I am the one who has been making it very difficult for you to receive your payment after you have fulfilled all the basic requirements in other to enable you receive your rightful payment because your partners made a promise to me that they did not fulfil. I will also advise you for your best interest to stop spending any more money in pursuance to this payment until this matter/issue is been resolved otherwise, you will end up loosing your hard earned money without any success.

Due to the humanitarian feelings I have, in fact I have tried my best to invite your partners to my Honourable office for the reconciliation of this matter amicably but they bluntly refused and told me that they can get this payment effected into your nominated bank account without my consent after all the assistance I have given to them and which they have not been able to do/achieve up till now.

I have decided to contact you directly to settle this matter once and for all so that I can lift the STOP ORDER being placed on your payment for the immediate credit into your nominated bank account if you will be willing to cooperate with me. Don’t forget, no payment whether contract payment or next of Kin/Inheritance fund leaves the offshore of this great country (Federal Republic of Nigeria) without my signature. Therefore, you should not be deceived by anybody who might ask you to send money to him in order to enable him release your payment.
A WORD IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR A WISE..!!!

I hope you will understand and act swiftly as I will continue to watch you with one of my eyes open.

Yours Faithfully,

MR. AKIN OLUJIMI (SAN)
Attorney General/Honourable Minister of State.

Awesome, I have the Attorney General/Honorable Minister of State as a pen-pal!

[Exorcist_Fist]

At least this time the have the real minister's name, at least according to this site from the Nigerian Embassy in Argentina...

http://nigerianembassy-argentina.org/government/xministers.shtml

But why exactly the minister is emailing you via myway.com remains a mystery!

Edit: More data on Akin...

http://www.sunnewsonline.com/webpages/opinion/2004/sept/10/opinion-10-09-2004-001.htm

http://www.sunnewsonline.com/webpages/opinion/2004/Oct/4/opinion-4-10-2004-002.htm

http://www.biafraland.com/AUG_26/FG%20Accuses%20MASSOB%20of%20Treason.htm

[Tripitaka of AA]

Wow, that's real "ministerial" and all...

I particularly liked;

Be dully informed...



So how much do you need to offer him? What amount will grease the pen-pusher's perspiring palm? How about you disguise it in the traditional "diplomatic way", by offering a gift... how about a Propane accessory!

Maybe a Propane/Methane Converter, as used in the stockyards of Chicago to generate power from all that bu!!sh1tt. Or a Propane-powered Ministerial deluxe limousine sized portable BBQ, containing some Krugerrands or other valuable secondary content.

[Cady Goldfield]

There's certaining nothing "dull" about this little interlude from the minister.

But a kidnapping would have been more exciting.

[Soulend]

I think a kidnapping/robbery is always an option for these 419 folk. There have been (at least 1 I know of, in '95) instances of this happening to poor gullible souls showing up in Lagos after falling for the scam. The thing above is kind of a side track, I think, because it sort of threw 'em for a loop that I would just show up in London as per the fax from 'Monumental Trust' and discover that no such place exists and that the number is for a cell. The "From" line in the e-mail sent to me by Akin says it originated from justice.akin@oninet.pt - though it could be spoofed. I haven't bothered checking it against the IP.

Note how his message brings up the existence of dishonest parties and that he is still capable of rescinding the order - something not possible were the 'consignment' in London, far from his 'jurisdiction'. Now I get this from our trusty lab assistant, which seems to confirm my thoughts:

To Mrs J Blome

Mr Soanko is to undergo minor surgery tonight.

Find below the message he dictated to be sent to you

Mrs Bisi Ige (H.Lab)
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

Sweetheart, I am very sorry for the sad event.

Friday evening, a reliable first class information
revealed to me that Oak and Monumental had organized
another individual to take delivery of the acticle in
camoflag as Mrs Joane Blomn. The people in possession
of the Boxes in Holland refused to release it except
the impersonator is able to prove herself with an
Int'l passport. Now I guess these idiots are working
towards obtaining passport when you arrived, this is
exactly the cause of their anger. I have spoken to
the
Holland person in charge and appealed to him not to
release the goods to anybody becausethe real owner has
been misled by Oak and monumental. The Holland man
also said he suspected it because it was unusual for
Monumental to recommend that goods be released to a
client on presentation of ID Card. The Holland person
said, this was not acceptable to him because if
trouble comes after delivery, he will be held
accountable. The woman eventually left but with a
promise to come with her Int'l passport.

In summary, the man has collected the phone number of
the High Court, he said he has to first verify certain
things, then he would come back to me. I have also
given him your phone/fax and email address. He wanted
to know how he could reach you in London but I told
him you must have left. I am happy I had almost
fufilled my agreement with the Court and they knew I
am sick, else I would have paid up the balance of
150, therefore, I have nothing to fear regarding
whatever he might want to find out from the High
Court.

Continue to pray for me to leave the Hospital alive
and
in good time too, I am confident the man in Holland
will be our second God in this matter. Should you
receive any message from Holland, please don't reply,
first forward it for my advice. The Holland man said
we have to keep away from Oak and its partner until he
conclude his investigation with the High Court

My souurce of information was a staff of Oak and I
have
assured him on my honour to keep it to myself till I
die. We shall compensate him at the appropriate time.

Once again, pray for me especially at this critical
period of my live. END OF DICTATION BY MR SAONKO

Geez, I think this one has had more twists and turns than any I've seen on the sites dedicated to messing with these people. Guess I'll write back tomorrow after my "return to the States". :D

[mokonotora]

Why do they keep on spelling your Last name, Bloom, differently. Their mistakes aren't even consistant in the same post? It's not like your last name is um, Pfuetzenreuter, ya know.
Do they do this on purpose or are the ADD kids grown up?

[Cady Goldfield]

Got a juicy one this morning. It is only for god-fearing persons, so if you're not, don't respond. ;)

--------------------------------------
SUBJECT: PLEASE BE SINCERE TO THIS FUND.


Dear Sir ,
I am Mrs gezi Caroline,the wife to Dr.Gezi David, who worked with ChevronTexaco in Sierra Leone In Africa for twenty years before he died in the year 2000.We were married for twenty-seven years without a child. He died during one of the riot in Sierra Leone .
He was held hostage and slain to death by protesting youths of the region.
Before his death we were both born again christians.Since his death I
decided not to re-marry . When my late husband was alive he deposited
the sum of (Eight Million six hundred thousand U.S.Dollars)with a bank in Europe.
Presently, this money is still with the bank and the management just wrote me as the beneficiary for the claim of the money,to rather issue a letter of authorisation to somebody to receive it on my behalf as i am still in the hospital.the reason why you are going to open an account with the bank it is because the money is in suspend account
Presently, I'm with my laptop in the hospital where I have been undergoing treatment for cancer of the lungs. I have since lost my ability to talk.
It is my wish to see that this money is invested the proceed at the end of every year distributed among charity organisation. I want a person that is God fearing that will use this money to fund churches,orphanages and widows propagating the word of God and to ensure that the house of God is maintained. The Bible made us to understand that Blessed is the hand that giveth.
I took this decision because i know that there are alot of poor people suffering from different kind of disease and nobody to come to their aid.
With God all things are possible. As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the bank.
so that you open up account with them to enable them transfer the total fund into the account that you are going to open with them.
I will also issue you a letter of authority that will prove you as the new beneficiary of this fund.You are to help me invest this funds into real estate and stocks.You will be entitled to 10% of every profit you make in a year.
Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I stated herein.
Hoping to hearing from you soon.
waiting for your reply
Yours in Christ,
Mrs Mrs gezi Caroline,
My Telephone Number Is :00232-76722170,
N.B At the moment my handy is switch off as i am in hospital that why i sujested that you should contact me through email.

[bgb]

Reverend Cady,

Me thinks you ought to have a go at it. :D

Barb Bloom

[Cady Goldfield]

Suddenly I got religion. ;)

[kenkyusha]

After all, her husband was, "slain to death." I understand that the outbreak of those non-lethal slayings they had in Africa has given way to... oh wait...

Be well,
Jigme

[monkeyboy_ssj]

Originally posted by kenkyusha
After all, her husband was, "slain to death." I understand that the outbreak of those non-lethal slayings they had in Africa has given way to... oh wait...

Be well,
Jigme

I'll kill you until you die! :D

[Mekugi]

I think an e-mail should be sent stating that the beloved Jo has been kidnapped by Al Queda forces led by Kat Stevens. Her laptop has been confiscated by insurgents and notices sent out to all parties in her Outlook Express adress book. Demand Ransom.