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Thread: Verbal preparations for actual or implied fisticuffs

  1. #1
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    Default Verbal preparations for actual or implied fisticuffs

    It would seem that nearly all violence is preceded by some verbal threat or warning. So often this is that special combination of tone, timbre, volume and facial expression that "squeezes the trigger" and sets off the explosion. Sometimes the brains of participants are already operating below par... and the verbal wit suffers from a case of foot-in-mouth that is sometimes so stupid as to cause laughter all around.

    This thread from MartialTalk.com has elicited some great anecdotes. Dumb things spoken as threats.

    Can the E-Budo throng come up with some Real examples of silly threats?


    An off-shoot of this is something that I've recently heard referred to as the "brain-fart". It is a momentary lapse in concentration that can be exploited for a pre-emptive strike. In a self-defence situation, being able to "throw" an opponent by saying something stupid/crazy/off-beat is a highly valuable skill. It can even be practiced in the Dojo (where laughter may be all too frequently the response). Quick thinking, or just a stock phrase that works for you, have you got any good lines that work to confuse someone long enough to remove their ability to detect your next move?
    David Noble
    Shorinji Kempo (1983 - 1988)
    I'll think of a proper sig when I get a minute...

    For now, I'm just waiting for the smack of the Bo against a hard wooden floor....

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    It really happened liike this:

    Setting - The Royal Oaks, a pub in Leeds, 1986. I'm there having quiet pint at the bar. Beside me a quite 'lubricated' guy and his, I assume, girlfriend.

    Him: "Hoi, arsehole, you eyein' up my bird?"
    Me: "No, not at all."
    Him: "Why the f**k not? Is she ugly or summat?"
    Me: (thinking, Oh Christ, cliche central!) "No, she's very pretty. You're a lucky guy."
    Him: "Lucky? What the f**k you know about lucky?
    Me: "Not much I guess"
    Him: "Pretty? Ya fancy her? Ya b'std!"
    Me: Yeah, she's pretty and I'm sure I'd have no chance with her 'cos she's with you.
    Him: Ya bollox! I'll stuff ya I will!

    At this point he rose off his barstool, took a swing and fell unconscious on the floor.
    Paul Kerr

  3. #3
    Gene Williams Guest

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    If you are confronted and you feel violence is likely, it is best to say nothing. Remain alert and prepared, that's all. Talking does no good and wastes energy and causes you to lose focus.

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    Say nothing, smile politely, and simply attack.
    David F. Craik

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    Originally posted by Gene Williams
    If you are confronted and you feel violence is likely, it is best to say nothing. Remain alert and prepared, that's all. Talking does no good and wastes energy and causes you to lose focus.
    Agreed. But a timely "Your shoelace is undone!" has been said to work wonders! I gather that there are people, such as Nightclub Bouncers, who have developed standard phrases that can distract a punter long enough to get a clear shot. With enough practice, on enough people, it is possible to reach a critical timing point such that it works every time (words like "almost" and "hardly ever" have been omitted fro brevity )
    David Noble
    Shorinji Kempo (1983 - 1988)
    I'll think of a proper sig when I get a minute...

    For now, I'm just waiting for the smack of the Bo against a hard wooden floor....

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    Originally posted by Soulend
    Say nothing, smile politely, and simply attack.
    Here in the U.S.A., two statements are absolutely necessary before fisticuffs, especially when witnesses are present:

    "Please stop, you're scaring me."
    "I don't want to fight."

    Then, if you're up to it, you can have them for lunch.
    Aaron J. Cuffee


    As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.
    - H.L. Mencken

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    Good call, Jeff. "C'mon, I don't want any problems" or "Okay man, it's cool" works wonders. Then again, if I have to fight things have gotten bad enough to where a simple assault charge doesn't mean that much to me.

    I would be amazed if 'your shoelace is untied' would work, the BG must be incredibly naive. I like non-verbal distractors, like glances to the side or extending one's beer to the side and dropping it. Although it's a grievous waste of ale, their eyes follow it to the ground every time.
    David F. Craik

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    A joke one said by Roy "Chubby" Brown:

    That's fighting talk where I come from...
    Why arn't you fighting?
    Oh I have moved away from there.

    As they used to say round here... are you talking to me or chewing a brick?

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    Default oddly enough

    I have used "When are you going to stop threatening me, and start actually hitting me? I am getting bored." and variants of that a few times. It actually worked as a deterrent (much to my surprise, as it wasn't my intent. I was just sick of the sh*t-talking and ready for violence).
    John Connolly

    Yamamoto Ha Fluffy Aiki Bunny Ryu

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    I don't go to those types of places anymore......
    Harvey Moul

    Fish and visitors stink after three days - Ben Franklin

  11. #11
    A. M. Jauregui Guest

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    It most certainly depends on one's whereabouts and intentions.
    If one prefers to keep it on the down low:
    • Position (slight vector adjustments), situational awareness (look around dummy), combatant awareness (simply keep an eye on them), smile, breath, maximum
      force (you can always scale back).

    If one prefers to eliminate the altercation:
    • Position (slight vector adjustments), situational awareness (look around dummy), combatant awareness (simply keep an eye on them), smile, scream (your
      breathing will automatically be taking care of), maximum force, proper force.

    A few choice words can prevent an altercation if the individual receiving them is cognizant (primarily fearful) of the situation. If they are too far gone, for whatever reason, mincing words will be of little use (but if deploying a knife or a gun a strong warning would be legally prudent).

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    Aaron has it nailed. The scum being cunning might well wish to sue you for damages- courts are notorious for siding with the shite of society. "You are scaring me" is excellent for civvie situations. At work- "sir be aware that I will defend myself" After that, no probs. In the bad old days we just used to wallop anyone who got in our faces- this being legally construed as an assault. If anyone gets heavy, they deserve a quick re-education. Personally, I don't hit anyone who is no longer a danger.

    Aaaaaahhhh................the old days......when fools took their hidings without whimpering to the cops............
    Lurking in dark alleys may be hazardous to other peoples health........

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    And people wonder why I hardly talk.
    Jonathan Wood

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    I once de-escalated a situation that I had previously escalated (with the words 'Don't nick televisions!'), with the words 'It's alright mate, I'm drunk', which was the understatement of the century.
    Jonathan Adrian Treloar
    Perception is strong, Sight is weak - Musashi
    Right forearm is strong, Sight is weak - Treloar

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    Default I don't go to those types of places anymore......

    I was once harrassed with verbal intent to assault at the checkout stand of my local grocery store.
    John Connolly

    Yamamoto Ha Fluffy Aiki Bunny Ryu

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