So I moved to Hollywood....

[Paul Madory]

....and no, I am NOT planning on making any movies. Hollywood is also a great city for musicians.

Relocated here as of Dec.3rd, and I've been running errands and playing tourist for at least the first week. Apparently, the movers threw the wrong box on the truck - the one containing my contact phone #'s for my new friends out here. (My possessions are still in transit.) So now my friends Tom and Jennifer are probably looking for me, and I am looking for them at the same time! Although he's not a member, Tom mentioned months ago that he reads E-Budo once-in-a-while, so I thought I'd publicly post my temporary contact info here:

Paul Madory @
Econo Lodge
777 Vine Street
Hollywood, CA
(323)-463-5671, Rm.108
SwampDragon@Shugendo.org

I may end up staying at the hotel longer than I thought, maybe even another week or two if this keeps up.... That would be difficult on my finances though.

To Jay or Jennifer: I could use some help. Please come pick me up A.S.A.P., like we talked about months ago. I usually never leave the hotel room before noon, and I can be easily found strolling up and down Hollywood Blvd. regularly, or at the indie-film Egyptian Theatre.

To Jennifer: I still love you very much! Are we still on for the Jeff Bridges tribute on Dec.17-18th at the Egyptian Theatre? Don't forget, okay? You have my cell phone#....

For the curious onlooker: my friends bought me a house out here! After not doing really anything for the holidays for 15 years, what an amazing Christmas gift, huh? I can't wait to move in.

Anyway....


In need of rescue,
Paul Madory

[Kaoru]

Hi Paul-san,

Do you remember their last names and what part of Holly they are in? You might be able to call information and get their phone number if it isn't unlisted. Maybe even an address too. If you haven't already, try looking in a phone book. There may be several phone books for the area, because it is not small... My brother works in Hollywood so that's how I know. When you call information, be sure to tell them whaart of Hollywood: if it is West, North Hollywood, etc. and if they live in an actual town and you know it, then the town obviously, within Hollywood.

Hope this helps, and you find your friends!

Good luck and enjoy in your new home! (And remember to lock your door every night! Any part of LA/Hollywood is dangerous.)

[kirigirisu]

A few bits of advice for anyone thinking of moving to the Left Coast, Los Scandalous in general and Hollyweird in particular.

While Tinseltown may be all exiting and new and whatnot for the hayseed fresh-off-the-bus (or plane, or off-ramp or whatever), one needs to take into account a certain phenomenon that affects the new transplant that can only be noticed by those who come to visit weeks, months, or perhaps years later:

That's right, folks.

I'm talking about the "Flake Factor."

To hopefully somewhat lessen the culture shock for those from other parts of the country who're honest as the trees are tall and stick to their word as real men should, let me propose to you the following:

Remember all the stuff you "talked about" doing "months ago" with the Angeleno in question once you came to visit?

Well, unless you got all of it in writing, notarized and processed by a expert team from one of L.A.'s many legal firms, don't expect to be "meeting up" with said Angelenos unless you're either extremely well connected, extremely attractive, extremely rich, or they have nothing better to do that particular weekend, if they bothered to remember in the first place.

Forget about it. "Months ago" might as well be "never discussed." Prepare for lots and lots of disappointment as you start to get constantly stood up and flaked out upon by those with whom you make casual oral agreements. Until, of course, you acquire the ability to sniff out these flakes (about 90% of the population) and learn to deal only with those who have some sense of ethics or honor.

If you need to deal with these flakes out of desperation or necessity, make sure you have a written agreement of some sort, or a firm oral agreement ("Yes, we will meet at X time on Y date to do Z activity, I have acknowledged this and have pledged my firstborn child/left testicle/"eternal soul" as collateral should I fail to carry out the agreed-upon activity, so help me YHWH/Allah/Jehovah/Vishnu/Thor/Osiris/Zeus/Hypothetical Alleged Omnipotence").

That being said, good luck, and GHU damn all flakes and their bastard offspring.

And get a freaking job. The chances of you hooking up with the next superband and getting signed to EMI or Universal or Virgin or getting a gig on the Empty-V (Universal (music) and MTV are actually in Santa Monica, about a block from each other on Colorado) are pretty damn small and you might want to hedge your bet with something that provides food, gas, and beer money in the meantime.

Plus Pay-to-Play is a scam.

Good luck.

[Paul Madory]

Oh, I know their last names. We've known each other for nearly two years. They are people of integrity, don't worry. They talked me into coming, actually.

Cliches, cliches, cliches....

To Julia: I tried your H&H Lounge, but no luck. Maybe just have it at my new place instead?

Hmmm... The phone rang this morning at 11am - just once though, then a dial-tone. If anyone I know is having technical trouble patching through, just swing by IN-PERSON. We'll run into each other eventually....

[Kaoru]

Originally posted by Paul Madory
Oh, I know their last names. We've known each other for nearly two years. They are people of integrity, don't worry. They talked me into coming, actually.

Cliches, cliches, cliches....

To Julia: I tried your H&H Lounge, but no luck. Maybe just have it at my new place instead?

Hmmm... The phone rang this morning at 11am - just once though, then a dial-tone. If anyone I know is having technical trouble patching through, just swing by IN-PERSON. We'll run into each other eventually....

Hi!

Not a cliche all... What Kirigirisu and I said is actually true. If you never lived there, don't be so quick to not believe us. LA and Hollywood both are known for their dangers as well as their tinsle and the awesome things they have.

Have you known these people in person for that length of time? If not, be careful. Buying a friend for a house is kinda odd and rather unheard of.

I forgot about this in your 1st message:

Please come pick me up A.S.A.P., like we talked about months ago.

Months ago?? Why so long ago? You SHOULD have been discussing this just recently before just showing up in Hollywood. When did you talk to them last? If you will please excuse me for saying this, that was just dumb. NEVER just up and move and expect something free like a house without seeing anything in writing. If you haven't had any contact with these people for that long, don't you think it would have been wiser to have contacted them FIRST before actually moving there?

Look. It has been a week and they have your cell phone no., but yet, nobody bothered to call. What does that tell you?
They aren't looking too hard for you.

Should you decide to try being a musician in LA/Hollywood...

Please re-read Kirigirisu-san's last paragraph. As a trained musician myself, I can attest to what he said. You will not become a wealthy musician there. You must be good and a Musician's Union member to get the good gigs. It takes on average about 1-2 years of constant door banging to get even noticed and for your name to get around. Take ANY gig you get and NEVER turn one down until you get your name around. As the new kid on the block, you can't be picky and choose. If you turn gigs down, expect not to be called, as word will get around. You must be able to read music if you hope to get anywhere at all in the business. If you can read, great. If not, get lessons and learn right now. No studio gigs will come you way without reading skills. LA/Hollywood is pretty cutthroat, but not as bad as NYC.

Oh, and one of the best ways to get your name around is by going to jam sessions.
Please remember proper sitting in etiquette. (Yes, it exists.) Have your cards with you too. Check the "City Pages" paper found in many music stores and coffee shops for gig info.

And, GET A JOB OR YOU WILL STARVE.
Living there is VERY expensive and you will find that out soon enough, if you decide to stay. Trust me on that. Unless you are in top demand in the studio or in an orchestra or on the first call list of the best theaters and musicians in town, forget getting to eat unless you have a "real" job or a steady GOOD paying gig. Getting a steady good paying gig is every musicians dream, and only a few get that. It will take quite a while to work your way up the ladder, so practice hard, get that day job, and let us know how it is going, if you decide to stay.

Oh, and if this house thing falls through, be prepared to live in a dangerous neighborhood until you can afford a decent place to live. That is the reality. Good luck, and I really mean that. I hope this does turn out for you in the end, and they are honest people.

[kirigirisu]

Sigh, I'll bite...

Originally posted by Paul Madory
Oh, I know their last names. We've known each other for nearly two years. They are people of integrity, don't worry. They talked me into coming, actually.

And, er, they "talked you into coming" how? And how long ago?

Cliches, cliches, cliches....

Hmm. And I suppose a decade worth of experience in the entertainment industry (five of those years spent hiring and firing actor-types except for this one gig where I had to cast for musicians--the one group of people even flakier than actors, an experience I've had the good fortune never to have repeated to this day) don't really amount to much in the face of eternal and sometimes blind optimism.

Go figure.

To Julia: I tried your H&H Lounge, but no luck. Maybe just have it at my new place instead?

Er, dude, wouldn't this "Julia" already have given you some other means of communication besides posting on a semi-public forum with a relatively small audience classified-ads style by now?

Then again, if'n this is a performance piece, you're doing quite well.

Hmmm... The phone rang this morning at 11am - just once though, then a dial-tone. If anyone I know is having technical trouble patching through, just swing by IN-PERSON. We'll run into each other eventually....

Sounds like a rejected lyric from a Yellowcard song...

"If I could find you now things would get better
We could leave this town and run for-ever..."

Rock and Roll!!!

:w00t:

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by Kaoru
...Buying a friend for a house is kinda odd and rather unheard of.

I'll say. But then we are talking about California.

Most houses just sit around all day, though, and don't get around much; maybe we should all buy friends for a few houses.

[Kaoru]

Originally posted by Brian Owens
I'll say. But then we are talking about California.

Most houses just sit around all day, though, and don't get around much; maybe we should all buy friends for a few houses.

Ahahaha! You know... I didn't even see that I had written that until you posted. hehehe, Too funny! Wonder how I managed that one!

Ermm... I am FROM California...(I just live here.) Your point is??

[Brian Owens]

Originally posted by Kaoru
...Ermm... I am FROM California...(I just live here.) Your point is??

My point? Oh, yeah, I guess there should be one.

You said, "...kinda odd and rather unheard of" in regards to a rather unusual real estate transaction; buying friends for houses, etc.

So I agreed that it was kinda odd and rather unheard of, but that being it was California we should expect that; I've have relatives in San Fransisco; they're kinda odd and, except at Christmas time, rather unheard of...or should that be "unheard from"? Anyway, they hardly ever call and never visit.

And Hollywood! Well, there ya go. "Kinda odd" really describes it, and "unheard of" describes the careers of most child stars once they hit 18.

But I digress.

Er, what was my point?

Never mind. I can't remember. These days my points seem kinda odd and rather unheard of.

[Paul Madory]

The saga continues....

Remember that show "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" ? That's what the motivation/inspiration was for my friends. I was deemed a "worthy cause" apparently, just like the families on that T.V. show. Only my friends are unafilliated with that program. So it's not such an unusual real estate transaction after all. Heck, it's done at least 40 times per year!

During the wait time, however, the property was temporarily sold to a trusted business friend of theirs. Her name is Carolyn Beshara, a friend of theirs for over 10 years. They put the property in her name so that she could professionally manage it as a rental property temporarily, until I arrived in town. Now I am here, and she doesn't want to give it back. Instead, she is stabbing her friends of 10 years in the back! Why the change of heart? What's strange is that there is still a "for sale" sign out front, and the property is listed on the Web as "Mediterranean", with in-ground pools and what-not. WTF?! Publicly available satellite photos I saw on the Web clearly showed that there was no physical modifications done to the property. Maybe that is the way it looked before my friends developed it, and it is simply mis-listed on the Web....

http://www.dbl.com/losangeles.html (property #1)

Anyway, it is still up in the air, until Ms. Beshara explains why she betrayed her friends....

[Mrose]

There's a sucker born every minute...
Dude, I think its time for you to go back home.

[Exorcist_Fist]

Or perhaps why your friends were dumb enough to do something like that without some form of legal documentation.

The real question is this:

The house was temporarily sold to Ms. Beshara, as you said. Whose money was used to purchase it? If Ms. Beshara used her own money...

[kirigirisu]

Young hayseeds getting suckered by the big, bad boogeyman (or woman, in this case) in a city of fakes, flakes, swindlers, grifters, con-men, degenerates, and entertainment lawyers?

The horror.

The horror.

Um, this is Hollyweird we're talking about.

(Gonna play along with this for a bit longer...)

Okay, if you're still determined to make a go of Californicating:

1. Get the hell out of that roach motel in hollywood and find something that won't hemmorage your wallet. I hear NoHo and the Valley are good places for musician types.

Or Venice if'n you're really desperate.

2. Get a freakin' day job. The many stores on Sunset Boulevard's Guitar Row are always looking for resentful young slacker "artists" to sell overpriced gear to the mommies and daddies of spoiled snot-nosed brats who want to imitate Sum 41 or SR-71 or Blink-182 or one of those other wannabe punk bands with the numerical monikers.

Or teach yourself the art of fellating fat, middle-aged degenerate queens and set yourself up with a "sugar daddy" in WeHo or the Swish Alps (Los Feliz).

3. Network. GIT or whatever the hell they're calling it these days might provide contacts of some sort, even if they're mostly foreigners who're trying to slip in under the whole "Student Visa" scam. Boardener's off Cherokee used to be a cool place, haven't been around in a while.

4. Get a damn plan of action that's somewhat freaking realistic and doesn't rely on the "Grace" of Yahweh, Vishnu, Jehovah, L. Ron Hubbard, Thor, or whatever Hypothetical Alleged Omnipotence you might subscribe to, and the "kindness" of strangers or semi-acquaintances.

Good freakin' luck.

Merry Effing X-pianmas.

:w00t:

[Soulend]

Sounds like something Mr. Abacha would be involved with.

[MikeWilliams]

This thread is utterly fascinating, in a day-time TV sort of way. I can't wait for the next episode.