View Full Version : What's your best mother joke?

Benjamin Peters
16th December 2002, 05:18
what's your best mother joke?

15th January 2003, 17:47
You're mum's so fat, the last time i mounted her, my ears popped!

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

I do have loads more, but that's my bestest one! :D

Son of Thunder
15th January 2003, 18:13
Your mama's so stupid, she thinks racism is an Olympic sport.

17th January 2003, 14:35
Your mum's so cheep and dirty, she doesn't by toilet paper, she just slides down the bannisters!

17th January 2003, 14:43
Your momma got an afro with a chinstrap, Your mom is so tall she did a cartwheel and kicked god in the head, your mommas glasses are so thick she can look into a map and see people waving at her...(More to follow)

Jon Gillespie

Budoka 34
17th January 2003, 19:02
Your mamas so stupid she sits on the TV and watches the couch!

Your mamas glasses so thick she can see the future!

Your mamas so poor she can't pay the rent on her cardboard box!

This is what you learn when you work with troubled youth. :wave:


17th January 2003, 19:43
your mommas sooooo big, her bellybutton has an echo.

Jon Gillespie

Budoka 34
17th January 2003, 20:00
Your mommas so skinny she turned sideways and disappearded!

Your mammas so dumb she thought a "quarterback" was a refund!

Your mommas so dumb she spent the whole day stareing at the Orangejuice container because it said concentrate!

Your momma so greasy she went swimming at the beach and they fined $10,000,000 her for creating an oil slick!

I really need a new job!:look:


28th January 2003, 23:43
Your mum's so hairy it looks like she got a gorilla in a headlock.

Your mum's so fat, when she goes to the cinema she sits next to everybody.

Your mum's like a crap rugby team ..... when she's playing, everyone gets a try!

Your mum's like a petrol station attendant ....... the more you pay, the more she pumps!

Your mum's so fat, she has an arse like two badly parked Volkswagen Beetles (anyone sad enough to recognise that as a quote from a TV program!?!?!?!?).

Your mum's got Zakerly disease ........ her face looks Zakerly like her arse!

I've got more, but thought the rest of you needed a break for a bit!

I'm a student .... i have no job ...... i have nothing better to do all day and all night that sleep and drink beer. I'm scared that one day i might have to leave!

Mushin San
29th January 2003, 11:26
yo mamma so fat. i had to roll her in flour to find the right fold

30th January 2003, 11:41
Your Mum's so fat, she puts her belt on with a boomerang!

Your Mum's so fat, she buys her clothes in 3 sizes .... "XXXXL", "Obese", and "Oh my God, it's coming towards us!"

Like i said earlier, i'm a student and apart from this, have nothing better to do that eat, sleep and get drunk!

Ron Rompen
31st January 2003, 01:48
Larsen.....buddy, pal, friend.

Stick with getting drunk :-) These are pretty bad.

31st January 2003, 04:21
Your momma's such a slut, the US navy got her registered as a port of call.

(I made that up as a kid, darling cherub that I was)

2nd February 2003, 22:46
Thanks for the advice, i do try and stick to getting drunk. But booze costs money, and i'm a poor student. When money gets tight i have to look elsewhere to get my kicks!

Anyway, those were just my better jokes. i didn't think you guys had done anything bad enough for me to start telling my bad jokes!!! :D :D :D :D :D

4th February 2003, 18:17
your mamas house so small, the front and back door are on the same hinge.

your mamas house so small, you gotta eat a large pizza outside.

your mamas so pooor, the last time she had a hot meal, her house was on fire.

your mamas so poor, her house got a kickstand.

your mamas breath so loud...shes deaf.

your mamas so dumb, she got pistol whipped with a knife.

your mamas so fat, she jumped for joy and got stuck.

whats the difference between your mama, and an elevator in the projects?
--not everyone rides the elevator

i would be your daddy, but that other fool had more bananas to coax your mama out the tree with.

your mamas so ugly she got 50 pairs of jordache and STILL aint got the look.

your mamas so stupid she got fired from a blow job

your mamas so fat, seen her the other day wearin a coca cola sweater, saw a lil kid step on her knee, put a quarter in her ear, and push her titty.

your mama aint got no legs, she shops at "just shirts"

your mama aint got no arms, but she talkin bout..."UNHAND ME"